1. Welcome to SportsJournalists.com, a friendly forum for discussing all things sports and journalism.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register for a free account to get access to the following site features:
    • Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
    • Access to private conversations with other members.
    • Fewer ads.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon!

Funniest thing you have read on The Onion

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by 93Devil, Jan 19, 2009.

Page 4 of 5
  1. mustangj17

    mustangj17 Active Member

    Hahah they still sell that too. My buddy has it.
     
    mustangj17, Jan 20, 2009
    #37
  2. Fenian_Bastard

    Fenian_Bastard Guest

    I am now, and always will be, a Jeanketeer!

    http://www.theonion.com/content/columnists/view/teasdale
     
    Fenian_Bastard, Jan 20, 2009
    #38
  3. Shaggy

    Shaggy Guest

    I could read the man on the street questions every day and laugh every day. They never let me down.

    As for a couple of great stories, I think Hammurderer is the best. Here are some others:

    http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28692

    NFL Star Thanks Jesus After Successful Double Homicide

    CHARLESTON, SC–Washington Redskins defensive end D'Aundré Banks gave "all thanks and praise to my personal Lord and Savior Jesus Christ" Monday for giving him the strength he needed to fatally stab bouncer Isaac Edmonds and ex-girlfriend Pamela Hamilton outside a Charleston nightclub early Sunday morning.




    http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33930

    Fuck Everything, We're Doing Five Blades
    By James Kilts
    President, Gillette

    "But you know what happened next? Shut up, I'm telling you what happened—the bastards went to four blades. Now we're standing around with our cocks in our hands, selling three blades and a strip. Moisture or no, suddenly we're the chumps. Well, fuck it. We're going to five blades."
     
    Shaggy, Jan 20, 2009
    #39
  4. EmbassyRow

    EmbassyRow Active Member

    Wasn't there a "I am in a promising local band" t-shirt? I could swear I had that at some point.
     
    EmbassyRow, Jan 20, 2009
    #40
  5. tapintoamerica

    tapintoamerica Well-Known Member

    I'm voting for this one:
    http://www.theonion.com/content/news/obama_modifies_yes_we_can_message
     
    tapintoamerica, Jan 20, 2009
    #41
  6. dixiehack

    dixiehack Well-Known Member

    dixiehack, Jan 20, 2009
    #42
  7. PopeDirkBenedict

    PopeDirkBenedict Active Member

    I am going with Clinton Deploys Vowels To Bosnia

    http://ifaq.wap.org/society/voweldeployment.html
     
    PopeDirkBenedict, Jan 20, 2009
    #43
  8. Del_B_Vista

    Del_B_Vista Active Member

    For just the sheer depth of cosmography:
    http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28898

    Also,

    Stabble, stabble, stabble!
     
    Del_B_Vista, Jan 21, 2009
    #44
  9. PopeDirkBenedict

    PopeDirkBenedict Active Member

    I don't know if being very fucking true makes this one hilarious or depressing or both.

    http://www.theonion.com/content/node/29860
     
    PopeDirkBenedict, Jan 21, 2009
    #45
  10. editorhoo

    editorhoo Member

    "Chess Club Hazing Victim Can't Get Rook Out of Asshole."

    That's my all-time favorite Onion headline.

    I have The Onion T-Shirt, "I appreciate The Muppets on a much deeper level than you."

    I get the strangest looks when I wear it.
     
    editorhoo, Jan 21, 2009
    #46
  11. Walter_Sobchak

    Walter_Sobchak Active Member

    Walter_Sobchak, Jan 21, 2009
    #47
  12. Ronnie "Z-Man" Barzell

    Ronnie "Z-Man" Barzell Active Member

    Ronnie "Z-Man" Barzell, Jan 21, 2009
    #48
Page 4 of 5
Draft saved Draft deleted

Share This Page