funny jokes

Q: What do you call a preps reporter without a girlfriend?

A: Homeless.

 

Am I the only one who has no idea what this joke means?

 

Man who go through turnstile too fast end up in Bangkok.

 

Arrr... bigpern - you be a picaroon of hot blood and cold brain

 

I confess I have no idea what a picaroon is either. However, after going back reading the joke again, I got it. It still wasn't funny (not that mine was any better, though it didn't require proper French pronunciation to get it).

 

A cowboy was in Spain and didn't know what he wanted to eat at the restaurant, so he just pointed to something on the menu. The waiter, who knew English, replied, "Ah, senor, you have excellent taste! Those are the bull's testicles from the bullfight this morning--A delicacy!" The cowboy, though momentarily taken aback, said, "What the heck, I'm on vacation down here! Bring me an order!" The waiter replied, "I am so sorry, senor. There is only one serving per day, because there is only one bullfight each morning. If you come early tomorrow and place your order, we will be sure to save you this delicacy!" The next morning, the cowboy returned and placed his order; then that evening he was served the one and only special delicacy of the day. After taking a few bites and inspecting the contents of his platter, he called the waiter over and said, "These are delicious, but they're much, much smaller than the ones you served yesterday! Why is that?" The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, "Sometimes the bull wins."

 

There was once a crusty old guy (not spnited -- what's happened to that guy?) who had three daughters.

One night there was a knock at the door, and he answered.

"Good evening, sir. My name is Freddy. I've come to take Betty for spaghetti."

So Freddy left with Betty for spaghetti.

A few minutes later, there was another knock.

"Good evening, sir. My name is Benny. I've come to take Penny to Denny's."

So Benny went with Penny to Denny's.

A little later, there was another knock.

"Good evening, sir. My name is Chuck."

"Get the fuck out of here, Chuck!"

 

A guy's car broke down on his way to the golf course, so he leaves his car by the side of the road, puts a bunch of golf balls in his pockets, takes his bag and catches the bus toward the golf course.

He sits down next to an old lady who keeps looking over at his pants and his lap.

He says to her "It's golf balls"

She replies to him "Does it hurt like tennis elbow?"

 

Why is 6 scared of the nine 7?
Because seven eight nine.

 

Confucius say, "Stand on toilet, get high on pot."

 

Get a French pronunciation guide.

 

With your condescending criticism of the previous efforts, I was expecting much more than that.