Has your paper made "Headlines?"

My last stop had one that would've been on had it been submitted.

A wheelchair beauty pageant. Writer's lede finishes with "...and she walked away with first prize."

 

my old job had almost ran a headline saying that senior citizens learn blowing and shoveling...or something like that.

us sports guys, since we're the only ones with sick and deluded minds - our ME observed that we all needed counseling after filling out a mental health day - were the only ones who caught it and enjoyed informing letting the rest of the staff in on the joke.

It was changed to snowblowing

 

I don't know. That would mean watching Leno to find out.

 

I remember that.

 

The paper I was at as a high school co-op student should have made it. The editor gave me a story about a daycare opening up and said it's done, put it on this page. Well, I was rushing to do something else and figured he'd proof it later himself. Page layed out.

Apparently, said editor's code for information he had to go back to check was XXX. Sure enough, we had the XXX day care centre opening up in town and looking for people to volunteer with XXX activities. I kid you not.

 

A major statewide daily fired an agate clerk for writing "I like big tits" in the middle of bowling scores.

 

I think I'm more surprised to somebody caught than by what he wrote.

Just reading these makes me nervous. I jokingly threw in a "Our team is fucking awesome" as a quote while setting up a gamer that was about to start. I never do that sort of shit because I've seen what happens. But now my mind is wandering through 500 different things and trying to recall whether I changed this thing or that thing two weeks ago, two days ago and two years ago. If I still have work in the morning, I suppose things went okay.

 

Well, it COULD have been the name of the team.

 

I make it a point to watch those five minutes every Monday night. Typically the only Leno I watch all week.

 

I'm told we had one make it before I got here. The headline was something along the lines of "Flood caused by rain"

 

My old stomping grounds had one recently.

"Residents: Wetlands too damp"

 

The "Vagina Monologues," an off-broadway play,
was to perform in the hometown. Naturally, our
headline for Friday's paper read:

Vagina's open today