Have you ever heard your woman pass gas? To the women: Why hide it?

Zeke, that story was classic...

Me, I won't willingly fart in front of anyone, even other guys. As crass as I can be at times, that part of the Southern upbringing stuck. If you have to fart, go somewhere else to do it...if not a bathroom, at least a place as far away from others as is reasonable.

I still remember the worst gas I ever passed. I'd eaten some chili that I knew might have gone bad, but I ate it anyway, like an idiot. A big ol' bowl, too. Hours later, I was in the aisle of a bookstore, and my ass unleashes biological warfare...a gust from the crypt...or Hades...as if ol' Beelzebub himself had eaten a stew of rotting corpses, fetid lentils, sprouted garlic, moldy onions and powdered sulphur...and let one rip. I didn't just leave the aisle, I left the store.

 

I refuse to go to the bathroom. it's a more confined space.

But I rarely, if ever, wave them in anyone's direction.



Anymore.

 

Wife has farted in front of me, I've farted in front of her (including the first date and she just laughed it off). Sometimes in the car on the way home from a restaurant we'll have belching contests in the car.

But no open door policy on the bathroom. That is something that is done alone, behind a closed door (or a partially closed door should the cat manage to push the door open and visit while one of us is on the toilet)

 

I grew up in a house where the only privacy I ever had was in the bathroom. That's why I take extra-long showers and still have a closed-door policy for everything. Sometimes I just go in there and close the door to put on makeup or brush my hair, because I still have that sense of "this is my time, just for me."

 

There is nothing worse than a dog's farts. Our Jack Russell puppy, now 6 months old, has a hell of a gas problem. None of the mutts I had before we got a Jack Russell (actually, a product of a vagabond knocking up a Jack Russell but the JR genes prevailed in appearance) ever had farting problems or for that matter, health problems. Bob Barker needs to neuter the full bloods.

 

SC farts in her sleep (fucking vegetarian diet. She's smart enough to know better.) I, however, have never farted, looked at my butt and then run off into the other room. Ever. If anybody says otherwise, they are lying!

 

I keep a copy of North Dallas Forty next to the can.

 

I thought that's why women went shopping. No man in his right mind goes shopping with his wife, so they have to go alone, or with girlfriends.

 

Burping and passing gas in public with no shame is crude, gross, offensive behavior. The vast majority of mature adults understand this.

Apparently, your emotional development was arrested at 11.

 

Let one rip, Hondo. You'll feel much better.

And it might help remove that stick. 8)

 

yeah. besides, sometimes you can't fucking help it. you might be able to rip it silently but you're in a spot where you can't get up and away from people immediately, so the fart comes out. it happens.

i actually think the opposite is kind of true: as long as it's not continuous i don't condemn anyone for letting one go in public.