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HELP! I'm struggling with an important decision

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by three_bags_full, Feb 22, 2024.

  1. three_bags_full

    three_bags_full Well-Known Member

    The same coverage is provided. Not free as it is now, but at a very low cost.
     
  2. Octave

    Octave Well-Known Member

    Obey any apprehensions about Alabama - they are not there for nothing.
     
    2muchcoffeeman likes this.
  3. Inky_Wretch

    Inky_Wretch Well-Known Member

    What about staying on NOVA long enough for your son to finish high school?

    Otherwise, they aren't making more land. Ten acres that close to decent size town and not far from B'ham will only go up and up in price. My rule is to never turn down acreage.
     
  4. Driftwood

    Driftwood Well-Known Member

    I'll take a different approach because I don't have kids.

    Where do you and your wife want to live?
    If you are good with Alabama after seemingly have lived more of your life not there than there, it sounds like a good plan. But if just don't want to be there, you wouldn't be happy. Someone could give me a house where it's cold and/or crowded, and I'd hate it.
    Don't you fly helicopters in the Army? If so, it seems to me if you want to keep working, you'd look for a job flying helicopters and let that guide you to a new location. I'm not a pilot, but it seems to me that would be hard to walk away from cold turkey. (If I'm mistaken about the helicopters, this line is not applicable.)
    My wife and I are hopefully making our move in another year. I will be able to draw some retirement but will have to work another 8-10 years doing something to supplement my income and keep me out of trouble. I don't really care what I wind up doing because the goal is to be where I want to be.
     
  5. micropolitan guy

    micropolitan guy Well-Known Member

    Except with livestock and other animals, could you ever just pick up for two or three weeks and go on vacation or take a trip, etc? Getting family/friends to dog or cat-sit is one thing. Probably much tougher to find someone to feed/milk farm animals for a month.

    As has been said, make the choice for you and your wife. Your children will be gone off to college and life before too long; how many young people hang around in rural Alabama? You don't want to be trapped someplace in your early 50s.

    I don't supposed Montgomery needs a traffic copter pilot.

    Good luck. Sounds as if you have a history of making good choices, so no doubt you'll continue doing that.
     
  6. I Should Coco

    I Should Coco Well-Known Member

    TBF, you and your wife are correct to worry about your son moving for the final year or two of high school -- but it might not be a completely negative experience, if you can find the academic, sports or other outlets for him. And it sounds like he will have plenty of family around.

    A situation from my family’s distant past: After I was off at college, my parents decided to not wait until they retired and move to the Phoenix area when they were in their early 40s. They found jobs and moved the summer before my sister's senior year of high school in the Chicago suburbs, and gave her the option to stay behind and live with our aunt, who was also in the school district.

    My sister decided to move with my parents. She had a rough, rough senior year socially at a huge high school in south Scottsdale. But she continued to do well in academics, got some scholarships to attend the University of Arizona and loved it there. She's been with the city of Mesa's water conservation department for nearly 25 years, a job she never would have taken if she stayed in the Midwest, and loves living in the "Valley of the Sun."

    Not easy for a teenager to accept a big change, or understand what might be best for them in the long run. But it can work out.
     
    Last edited: Feb 23, 2024
  7. playthrough

    playthrough Moderator Staff Member

    My wife and I talk about this stuff a lot. We're not close to retiring, but I've told her I don't want to be old in central Indiana. I want to go the desert southwest. My wife says "what if the grandkids are here" etc etc and I say they can come visit us. We can be the cool destination grandparents.

    I don't think I could do rural under any circumstances, but that's me.
     
  8. Neutral Corner

    Neutral Corner Well-Known Member

    I have a very clear view of the up and down sides - but I also live in Birmingham, which is pretty blue if politically powerless. The political outlook here is dismal for anyone who is not a White Southern Baptist Republican, and I see no reason for that to change in the next two decades, that's just reality. So no Medicare Expansion unless they are outright dragged into it kicking and screaming, and the rest is pretty much what you expect, right wing nonsense everywhere.

    I don't know what district you're talking about school wise, but in general I don't think much of rural Alabama education. Your son may adjust just fine and excel, as he's likely well ahead of the kids he'd be put in with. If he's good with it that's probably okish. OTOH, if he is not challenged he might lay down and do very little and get low B/C grades while screwing off altogether. College wise UA/AU/UAB/UAT are all pretty solid depending on his major, and there are other universities in the state that are perfectly fine.

    I'd say talk it out with your immediate family and get a read on them. Renting the house out for a couple of years might be viable, although that also depends on a decent renter who does not tear it up or allow the outbuildings and acreage to run down. You could certainly help your parents get into their new place and your son out of HS then sell and move, but that pretty much defeats buying the old home place. As was mentioned above, running some farm animals has much to recommend it but makes it hell to take a week off.

    I'd agree that quality broadband is pretty much a must for any number of reasons - work, education, streaming TV in the house, amusement/entertainment for all. If you are church people you can get a lot of value here if you find the one that fits your values. Get crosswise with the locals religion wise and it could be a bane. You're not moving to Mobile (where these two questions are very common directly after an introduction - "Who are your people?" and "Where do you go to church?") but they'll still be asked early. You have local families, that's a plus.

    Cost of living is low. Property taxes are very low. Quality of life can be as well, although certainly you have some control of that... but living rural cuts into many of those options. As a retiree living in Alabama my biggest concern would be access to quality health care, and that's a minus. If I keel over an ambulance can have me at a top notch hospital fifteen minutes after they load me up. Out in the sticks 'Bama, not so much. You'd go to Montgomery, I guess, which is... ok? Depends on where and what doctors and who your coverage is with.

    You'd be a couple of hours from the beach if that's important to you. Not close but not horrible either. Feel free to ask anything that occurs to you. I can see where it would work out great, and and I can see how easily it could go wrong. I don't blame you for being somewhat on the fence. It's a beautiful state, and most of the people are really nice as long as politics are not somehow involved. While I sometimes do the "Why the hell do we live in this hellhole?" we'll probably die here. It's not that bad overall.
     
    Inky_Wretch likes this.
  9. tapintoamerica

    tapintoamerica Well-Known Member

    2muchcoffeeman and I Should Coco like this.
  10. I Should Coco

    I Should Coco Well-Known Member

    Or even for routine medical procedures, such as everyone’s favorite “north of 50” scope job. I had my first of those last month and the waiting list in our Central Washington city was so, uh, backed up that many people have to travel 45 minutes to an hour away. (It’s because we keep losing gastrointestinal doctors).

    That might not sound like much of a drive , but if you’re in the final stages of prep … trust me, we took a route that went by campgrounds with pit toilets just in case!
     
  11. justgladtobehere

    justgladtobehere Well-Known Member

    In Alabama, would flying to oil rigs be an option?

    Don't know if you want to do it because you have said before it's tough on your body.
     
  12. BYH 2: Electric Boogaloo

    BYH 2: Electric Boogaloo Well-Known Member

    I'm about as far away from you as possible geography-wise, but we've got the same issues here. I'm due for a colonoscopy around the late summer/early fall and I called this week and booked an appointment for early August...with a new doctor b/c the guy who administered my first one is retired. The last time, I called about two months prior to the appointment I wanted and got one four or six months later. Had to call in a favor from another doc to get it moved up.

    As for 3BF's decision: I'm in a much different situation than he is--I was stupid and made journalism a career, so the idea of retirement is an LOL--but I'm having a lot of the same thoughts re: where to settle long-term. My wife and I are both getting frustrated at pissing away rent money every month and with a savings account that never seems to go up and understand we'd probably stretch our money and find a house farther somewhere else.

    But we have at least three problems. Our daughter is 11, so honestly, the window for an easier move probably slammed shut a few years ago. Just as importantly, as 3BF notes, it's essential to be some place where our daughter can have choices, if necessary, in the coming years. We have a lot of friends who have moved south to the Carolinas or Florida and have some property they can call their own now, but at what potential cost? It helps they are generally apolitical or right of center. We, uhh, aren't.

    In addition, most of our family members are in their 70s, so we'd like to be near them if possible. So hanging tight in Democrat-run New York State or heading to Connecticut or New Jersey seems to be a good idea...but most of the states are red and carried, in state-wide elections, by densely populated blue areas. We might just not get lucky again in two years. Our town's school board has managed to fend off Moms for Liberty lunatics the last couple years. Will we be so fortuante this spring and would we be so fortunate if we headed to a more remote area? I don't know.

    tl;dr Gimme a lobotomy and that cheap land down south.
     
    I Should Coco likes this.
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