Hilarious gag pulled on a telemarketer

What if it was Mel Tillis was on the other end?

Wait, I guess you wouldn't know if it was him or not, 'cause you just hung up on him! ;D

 

We're on the no-call list and we still get calls. I guess there's always a way around everything.
Last week, on Quinn and Cantera I heard a tape of a telemarketing call.The women who received the call was screaming and making all sorts of crazy threats, saying the telemarketer was worse than the 9-11 terrorists, that a friend of hers was gang-raped and she said a telemarketing call was worse than that, etc.
Anybody else hear that one?

 

Wow, and people thought lawyers and car salesmen were the scum of the earth. Apparently they have nothing on those gang-raping terroristic telephone solicitors.

 

I got a survey call the other day, asking about radio stations and their contests.

I was in a good mood, so I agreed to participate when the guy told me it would only take a couple minutes.

The thing took 27 minutes.

I didn't realize it took that long until after I hung up and saw the timer. Somehow I was nice about the whole thing, but I wish I would have asked to talk to someone in charge about how they planned to compensate me for my time.

Usually those things are harmless and take about five minutes. But I will never do another phone survey again. Every time I get a call like this I will refer to the 27 minutes of my life I will never get back.

 

By the way, just in case some on here are under the same impression as some people I get while volunteering, being on a do not call list does not exempt you from getting political calls.

Oh, and hanging up usually gets you called back. Saying you're undecided gets you campaign lit in the mail. Saying yes or no or whatever gets it over with.

 

My husband is typically rude and hangs up, and he's a really nice guy.
I'm not so nice, but I'm usually pleasant with them – not to the point of buying their slop, but nice nevertheless.
I realize it's not their fault they're stuck doing that crummy job.
And we all know that, but for a few breaks, we're one pink slip away from being stuck doing something as crappy as that.
So I cut 'em some slack, because I'm just so happy it's them and not me.

 

Used to be nice to telemarketers because they have a crummy job. Then one somehow talked me into buying magazines. They said I was chosen for some great deal for some small amount of money. I inexpicably give them my credit card info. Then, afterwards, they pile on charges and "services" that they say I "agreed" to and won't let me out of it. When I finally realize what happened, they already took a few hundred dollars from me, and when I call them to ask them to stop the subsciptions, the lady goes on the offensive and refuses to budge, saying I agreed to a 14 month subscription of their amazing service.

Fortunately, my bank gets my back, and cuts them off. I've gotten all sorts of letters and bills telling me how delinquent I am, and they continually call me to ask me to pay. The letters they send say silly stuff like "we certainly are entitled to our money" and "please pay" and "patience can be a virtue for so long" and "we want to provide the best service but we can't we giving you our amazing service if..." When they call, I either hang out right away or tell them how ashamed they should be for partaking in their shady company's scams of innocent people who simply were too nice to hang out on an annoying telemarketer. They still keep sending me magazines that sit in my doorway until the apartment custodians clean it up.

Moral is: Now, I'm flat out nasty to anyone who tries to telemarket me. I'm naturally a really nice guy, but getting scammed out of the hundreds of dollars was enough to make me clamp down. And that company still wants even more of my money.

I laughed at this one, but part of me also felt some retribution.

 

Several years back I heard a CD by some guy named Tom Mabe. Prank calls pulled on telemarketers. The best one involved a guy calling to sell him a burial plot. Tom tells the guy all about how he lost his job followed by his wife leaving with the kids. He tells the guy he's been sitting around all day with a shotgun contemplating suicide. He had finally prayed to God asking him to send a sign if he should kill himself. He tells the telemarketer that his call is the sign. Immediately the telemarketer starts backtracking and offering to get him in touch with a suicide crisis line. Tom insists that the call is a sign to let him know he needs to kill himself and he has every intention of following through. The call ends with the sound of a shotgun being fired and the telemarketer saying "Hello? Hello?"

Great stuff!

 

I do that a lot after the pause too, but occasionally not doing it pays off. I just recently got a call from a research company that asked if I wanted to view a bank commercial and then take an online survey about it in exchange for $20. I did it and never got a check for $20.

It was $25. And it didn't bounce.

 

I loved getting calls from Houston Chronicle subscription hags, simply so I could tell them I worked for a competing newspaper in the area and I wouldn't buy their rag if my life depended on it.

Then one day I got a solicitation call from my own paper's subscription department. Grrr.

 

And, there, folks, is the problem with America in a nutshell.

 

Hell, at one of my former stops, we used to get calls from telemarketers trying to sell us our own newspaper IN THE FUCKING OFFICE! Actually, the first couple of times it was funny, but by the time they had finished ringing every single phone in the building, it got pretty damn annoying.