How Not to Write a Column -- Sid! Style

Nonouting alert -- Sid Hartman is not The Sports Predictor.

 

If you're speaking about teams, NDSU may be better.

But if you line up players and go athlete for athlete, Minnesota would easily win out.

 

Who cares about athletes? Isn't the point of any sport to have a better team?

 

Well, then, if we suddenly want to have a shuttle-run or 40-yard dash competition, the Gophers will surely be excited.

Until then, they got their asses kicked by a much better football team.

 

Individual sport athletes--golf, tennis, track, swimming--would take umbrage with your statement.

 

Golf, tennis, track and swimming are team sports at the collegiate level, right, hb?

Anyway, that's sort of a silly diversion.

 

I'm less shocked by NDSU winning than I am by 30,000 or so of its fans driving down from Fargo and environs to witness the game in person. And that 30,000 tickets were available in the first place. I'm guessing Minnesota doesn't have much of a season-ticket base?

That all said, back to the original point: Sid is a world-class jerk. I think he doesn't retire because he's afraid he'll end up like Bear Bryant -- dead within weeks. So if writing his column keeps him alive, I suppose it's a worthy endeavor.

But only because of that.

 

They could smell the blood, Ly.

As long as it's a Gopher team they can beat, they will come.

 

And even that is borderline...

 

A labiaotomy??

 

Same thing happens when Iowa and, to a lesser extent, Wisconsin play at the Dome. Back in the 90s when the NCAA still had a delay of game penalty for crowd noise in the rule book Iowa almost got flagged for it AT THE METRODOME.

Yes, that's right, the home team got shouted down in its own stadium. Iowa fans also tore down the goalposts at the Dome when they clinched the Big 10 in 2002.

 

Gopher football has been pretty much irrelevant for the past 40 years.

But of course, Sid is still living back in the 60s.