I guess you're all right about me

Starting to think this is how it all went down :

 

Oh well, even Bambi had enemies, I guess.

 

I just don't believe we're getting an honest accounting of this.

And I think the responses here seem like BS keyboard hyper masculinity.

You've got two friends who were very close at one point and lost touch for some reason.
One contacts the other and suggests the reconnect by going to watch a fight at a bar.
And he tells the other guy he has cancer.

If you are the guy with cancer, you're going to be taken aback if your once close friend seems unconcerned.
You might not want weeping and gnashing of teeth, but you might expect more than 'Cancer, huh? My dad had that. Should we get nachos?'

On the other hand, if you are being told by a once very close friend that he has cancer, you're not just going to shrug it off.
I'm not suggesting I'd beat my breast and scream 'No! No!' But I'm probably going to express sympathy and concern, ask some questions, give him a chance to talk about it for a bit.
Because, you know, I'm not a sociopath. How is polite interaction with a former very close friend unmasculine, as is being suggested?

That does not excuse the guy bailing without saying anything.



This story, as relayed, makes no sense.

 

What I said in the initial post was pretty much what happened. What was said in the texts, I posted verbatim.

I'm not sure what else you'd like to know.

There was no arguing. The conversation seemed friendly. At the time, I didn't think my response was rude or unsympathetic, but obviously it's not my perception that matters, I guess.
I generally think of myself as a kind, empathetic kind of person, whose willing to listen to and help people whenever he can. At times, if I don't fell like I'm being treated fairly, I can be an asshole, but that's something I try not to be. Generally, I try to treat everyone as best I can.
We all have a tendency to think of ourselves as being better than we really are. Nobody thinks of themselves as self-absorbed, but some of us are.

It's kind of a rude awakening when you realize you're not the person you think you are.

 

Does he currently have cancer? This seems to be an important point.

 

No

 

Well, until your treatment of him upsets him so much that the stress suppresses his immune system and the cancer returns.

Way to go, SP.

 

So I guess I really am an asshole?

 

You're a human. I don't know if that means you're in good company, but you're in a lot of it.

 

Yes.
And your friend really is a bitch.

 

He *had* cancer, now he doesn't. They are at a bar to watch a fight. How much time is SP supposed to take validating this guy's feelings, post-cancer?

 

"Who was that guy you were watching the game with for four hours?"
"I have no idea. Never asked."