I pledge allegiance...

OK, try this one:

 

You're an American. That means you must supersize your first 10 McDonalds meals and play Hour of Power with PBR. Thems the rules.

 

or as my daughter called it when she was four, the Pledge of Egypt.

 

JR, you forgot Minnesota - that's the best hockey state among our 50 states.

 

We always think of Minnesota as just the southern extension of Manitoba and Ontario.

They're not real Americans.

 

Also, in America you can't buy milk in a bag. So if you're going to come here, start lifting weights to get ready for lifting those gallon jugs.

 

You guys foist William Shatner and Celene Dion on us, and now you want to take our most serious state?! I am outraged, you damn hoser!

 

Are you serious? You can't buy milk in a bag there? ???

Ah, Big Bruce. Isn't he great?

Chesley, Ontario -- the birthplace of actress Victoria Pratt, ex-Whaler/Jet/Capital/Nordique forward Paul MacDermid and Hockey Hall of Fame member Mickey MacKay. Tommy Burns, the first Canadian to win the world heavyweight boxing championship, also lived there as a child -- he was born nearby, on a farm outside Hanover.

 

Try this:



That should be easy. Been there.

 

Double J - American!
May she hold you close to her tit.

 

Me too. My wife and I had our engagement pictures taken at Inglis Falls, one of three waterfalls located within minutes of the city (on three different rivers).

It looks way cooler in the spring when there's a heavier flow of water.