If you left the journalism biz today ....

I take it the divorce went badly, Joe?

 

Pup, all I want to do in this life is go to work, do my job and then come home. I don't care about pay or how boring it is, just give me my check and 40 hours a week. Besides, I figure Target (unlike 90 percent of the newspapers in the world) won't bitch if I want time off in October to do a race somewhere.

 

I'd go back to school. get my Masters and go into teaching -- preferably journalism or public speaking/broadcasting. It's what I want to do when I retire from the business, if I'm fortunate enough to be able to do such a thing.

 

They bitched that I wanted to get married on a date previously disclosed to them in my application and a date that had been scheduled for a year and was less than a month away. They asked if there was any way I could change it.

 

A joke? Son, Cooley is the alpha and the omega of law schools. You can't even sniff biglaw unless you work at the Cooley Law Review (or at least volunteer to make photocopies at the Kinko's).

I heard there was a class-action suit against Cooley by all its graduates for fraud, but since the case was tried by Cooley graduates, it went nowhere.

 

Mea culpa. I'll shift my goals to Piggly Wiggly.

 

I cut grass at a golf course for two summers. It was the greatest job I've ever had.

 

FBI agent.

 

In order:
1. Voice-over artist (I want to be the new Don LaFontaine, but I have absolutely zero of his God-given talent)
2. Game-show host (I was incredibly disappointed not to be in the running for TPIR)
3. Brewmaster

But seriously, I'm blessed to be in an area that's always looking for reporters, even if it's non-sports. I see lots of ads for a graphic designer, and though I can slap a decent page together, I have a feeling that's not what they're after. I think my best bet will be doing desktop publishing for the National Ant Farmers Society of America or some other, equally anonymous special interest.

 

I can't believe no one has come up with what may be the most obvious choice for career transition -- bartender. Face it, a lot of us are intimately familiar with the work environment and the tools of the trade.

 

That's what I'm doing....it's a good, good gig.