It must be an election year because ...

"Gin up the base . . . gin up the base . . . "

(sung to the tune of "The French Mistake") . . .

 

I'M WORKIN' FOR MEL BROOKS!

 

Clearly this is a silly issue. First of all, how does gay marriage undermine straight marriage? Especially from a religious standpoint, if God recognizes my marriage to my wife, what do I care what the government says about mine or any other marriage. All that matters to me is what my wife, my God and myself say about my marriage.
Secondly, amendments should be to enumerate our rights. I seem to remember an amendment that took away the right to drink...how did that one go over?
I will not make a cheap joke here about how a gay marriage amendment would lead to dick-easys. I just won't...

 

Too late ... you already did.

Lyman, I asked a question of the conservatives and I'm still waiting for your answer. And Okie asked it too. HOW DOES GAY MARRIAGE UNDERMINE STRAIGHT MARRIAGES? HOW?

 

I used to be on the fence about this until Britney's first marriage that lasted, what, 55 hours? It was then that I realized, how can anyone say now that gays are some sort of threat to the "sanctity" of marriage?

 

Can't both divorce and gay marriage be a threat to the sanctity of marriage? I don't think this is an either/or situation. I am not in favor of the amendment but in no way does it legislate discrimination. If you want to get married, marry someone of the opposite sex. It's really very simple.

 

Yet people will vote for the Repubs anyway because a) Karl Rove knows how to bullshit voters and b) the Dems don't have a clue.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: the Dems might gain a seat here and there, but the Repubs are still going to control congress. This WILL NOT be 1994 in reverse.

 

This is all done just to paint Democrats in a way the GOP wants Democrats painted. It's a good political move, but at what expense?

The GOP is well aware that the Democrats are strongest when they can portray themselves as the party of roughneck teamsters and working men. The tough guy party, with the GOP being the pencil-necked, old-money dickheads that you hated in your mandatory college accounting class.

But the GOP puts this on the table and forces the Democrats to oppose it, hence, "Flaming liberals!"

Note to the Dems: Quit letting the right dictate your image to you. Take control of your own image for once. Jesus Christ, is it that hard to fucking figure out?

 

Then let's debate an amendment banning divorce.

 

I want my props. I wrote this a month ago.

Just to spell it out: I was being highly sarcastic.

 

Ban gayness, sure.
Ban divorce.
Ban porn.
Ban jacking off, for that matter.  Next time your 12-year-old kid swipes the Victoria's Secret catalog and trots off to the bathroom, call the cops and throw his pud-thumping little ass in juvenile.  Pervert!
Ban the Victoria's Secret catalog, for that matter.
The Inquisition, WHADDA SHOW!

Seriously though, I wish a "conservative" would answer the question. How is gay marriage such a threat that it merits an amendment?

By the way, I put quotes on conservative because traditional conservatism was against government meddling in people's personal lives.  People who still hold to that philosophy are real fucking few and far between these days.

 

It doesn't merit an amendment. It should be left up to the churches, but government has gotten overly involved in marriage benefits, etc., and it changes the dynamic a bit.