Kids reporting scores

"I'm calling to report the Bumfuck-Podunk score?"

"OK, what was it?"

"28-17"

(getting annoyed already) "Who won?"

"We did."

 

Me: What sport?
Coach: Basketball
Me: Guys or girls.
Coach: I'm the guys coach
Me: So what was the score
Coach: 43- 41
Me: Wait, I thought you said this was a guys score? Girly prep is girls only?
Coach: Yeah I'm the Catholic High guys coach calling in the girls score?
Me: What was the score again?
Coach: Girly Prep 41-43 Catholic High
Me: Who won?
Coach: We did
Me: Who is we again?
Coach : Catholic High
Me: Oh yeah. Sorry. Was this a league game?
Coach: Uhh... umm I don't know
Me: Well think about it, how about the first leading scorer?
Coach: Oh I didn't add it up yet.

 

Yeah, that's a bit extreme ... and you made yourself look like the dumbass in that conversation.

Unless, of course, you're Bill Simmons. Sorry, Bill.

 

It was just an example of some of the stupid shit I have had to deal with.

And if that's too extreme, you obviously never spent time taking prep calls, because calls like that used to filter in every day. And every day they seemed to get a little worse.

 

Also, where I spent most my time covering preps, we had more teams to cover than anyone could keep straight and many leagues were based on performance not geography or school size. Any give sport at any one of 28 schools in the league could be in one of four divisions. So bumfuck vs. podunk could be a league for girls basketball one season, but different for volleyball, or different the next year and so on. You can never keep up.

 

what?

 

I'd rather cry it out.

 

That's gotta suck. I liked having most of my teams in the same district/league/whatever for everything. Made things much easier, because a lot of the time we would have two of our schools facing each other in the same event.

So they group teams by performance? After a few bad seasons they get dropped down into the "suck league?" I'm surprised public schools would allow that. Most of them will bristle at referring to their junior high "B" football team because you're implying that the kids on the "B" team are no good and they'll go on to have major self-esteem issues or something.

 

consider yourself hugged, dog.

 

Yep. The top one or two teams get moved up a division the bottom one or two get moved down into the suck league. Sometimes a young team that gets moved down to the suck league turns out being really good for the next year or two, and pounds on the competition. Realignment is every two years.

 

Ah, the good ol' days:

Caller: I'd like to report the wrestling score for St. Druid versus Greencrest Academy

Me: Okay, what was the score?

Caller: 43-23















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HOLY DICK WHO THE FUCK WON?

Repeat as needed

 

We have had a student who wasnt on a team call scores in one season. She got pretty darn good at it.