Mind your F'ing business

One day last summer I was in the mall with my son. I'd just gone to the bank and I was going to take him for lunch. Like most little kids he always wears baseball hats and on this day he was sporting a Gap one somebody had got him for a birthday or Christmas or something.

So this old bat comes up to us (outside Zellers ironically enough, Beef) and says "Excuse me..."

I figure she needed directions to the lottery kiosk or the Tims.

So we stop. "Yes?", I say.

"I see your son is wearing a Gap hat."

Now I know exactly where she's going with this but before I can say anything she storms on.

"You know what Gap means don't you? It means gay and proud. Children shouldn't wear hats like that..."

I said, "Look he doesn't care what it means and neither do I. He just likes the hat. Do you make a habit of randomly stopping people in the mall to talk about garbage like that?"

"Well I'm sorry if I offended you," she stammered.

I made sure my son was looking away (he was fixated on all the stuff in the sporting goods store window) and got as close to her as I could and hissed, "It's too fucking late for that now."

And off we went to lunch with my son asking, "What does Gap stand for, daddy?"

 

the sad thing is that this loser probably really believes that gap stands for 'gay and proud.' what a fucking moron. a rude moron, too.

 

No problem ... tell him it stands for "Goalie and Proud".

 

I'm mildly surprised . I had come to think that worrying about others business was ingrained in Canadian culture.

 

Perfect! He'll go for that!

 

You should have heard the earful I got when I took my nephew to the mall sporting a hat that read "ATM."

 

I don't even want to know what kind of sick shit your nephew is into.

 

Will you marry me?

 

This story reminded me of Saturday Night Live:

We have some lovely horiday candrs.

APPROVED!

 

Thanks, OTR. Your posts made my day. Jesus, that shit is funny.

 

Dixie Chicken?

 

Zeller's sucks. [/rainman]