MLB Thread Number 3, 2007

The Phillies, Cubs and Yankees bullpens challenge the concept of "relief" unless you're talking about the opponent.

 

Dear Cubs:
We know it's folly for us to expect help from you. That said, we were taking solace in blowing a lead of our own when we looked up and saw you ahead 5-1 in the ninth, and then you had to pull this crap. So here's our suggestion: Please fling yourself off the Sears tower and kindly allow the kids in Des Moines to have their shot. At least then, we'll eliminate any thought of getting our hopes up when you play the Mets again.

Sincerely,

Braves fans

 

Kazmir with nine strikeouts through four innings, but also walked six and has thrown 109 pitches.

Tim Lincecum has six strikeouts through three innings, while Oswalt hasn't allowed a hit yet. Pretty good pitcher's duel in Houston.

 

CHICAGO (AP) --- In an attempt to shore up its struggling bullpen the Chicago Cubs announced today they have signed former reliever Doug Dascenzo and have assigned him to Triple A Iowa.

"We really think Doug can help us," Cubs general manager Jim Hendry said. "Sure he's been out of the game for over a decade, and he was really an outfielder, but left-handed set up men are tough to find. He'll pitch down at Iowa for a few weeks to get himself into game shape."

Commenting from his off-day reserved table at Murph's Bleachers, Cubs manager Lou Piniella said that Dascenzo "can't suck any worse than Eyre or that motherfucker Howry."

-30-

 

I went to the game with a couple friends, one a Yankees fan and the other a Cubs fan.

Watching my Cubs fan friend in the bottom of the ninth was a fascinating look into the human psyche. Instead of feeling comfortable with the Cubs' 5-1 lead, he stood with his arms folded and lips pursed. When Dempster began mixing walks with base hits, his head tilted back, eyes rolled skyward. After the P.A. announced that Scott Eyre replaced Ryan Dempster, the tortured human being to my left asked to no one in particular, "Why are they bringing in this fucking guy?" Finally, as Matt Murton's throw from right field landed in the vicinity of the Mets' dugout, my friend cursed the heavens and baseball gods that cruelly gave him hope and then metaphorically kicked him in the balls.

As a Mets fan, I thought it was a great way to get ready for Evil.

 

AQB, you almost had me. I mean, the Piniella quote is pretty realistic ...

 

Harry Caray would always muse about why Dascenzo wasn't in the lineup every day. He was small, had little power and average speed. He sometimes hit for average. But he always hustled, which is what Harry liked.

 

Here's your sign...

 

Didn't the Cubs use Dascenzo as a pitcher once or twice in blowouts? Kind of like in the '70s, when they used Larry Biittner (note the correct spelling of his last name) in the same role.

 

AQB's Cubs posts are probably my favorite thing on SJ right now.

 

You are not the only one who feels the same way.

It's not going to get better anytime soon. The Brewers will likely sweep the Twins. Twins play the Rangers and the Blue Jays next week, but the Twins haven't even beaten the bad teams this year so what hope is there. Chicago could distance themselves from the Twins on Memorial Day weekend.

The Twins are just unwatchable. Where is the fight or the spirit?

I am done with Nick Punto and the rest of the overrated piranhas, whose 15 minutes of fame was expired.

Terry Ryan may have to be busy making trades this July if this team is out of it. We may be seeing the last few months of Torii Hunter with the way things are going for this team. Who knows maybe Johan Santana too considering he might want to go where the money is?