My civic responsibility

I reported for jury duty on Monday morning at 8 a.m.

Fortunately, because of this thread, I kind of knew what to expect even though it was my first time reporting for jury duty.

I thought working for a newspaper would eliminate me quickly. I was wrong.

I will be serving on a jury for a civil case for the next FOUR WEEKS.

WTF?

 

Loki, that's a tough break. Sorry to hear that.

Two weeks? Sure. Four weeks? Damn.

Between you and cougs, the government sure loves sports reporters on juries. Maybe it's because we care enough to go into the community to report stories about everyday people for a paper, but are detached from what we normally see in courts. Just a thought.

 

Four weeks? Hmmmm.....

Do you still have your appendix/wisdom teeth/spleen/uterus/prostate?

If so, don't you think it's time those suckers came out?

 

Show up the first day dressed as the Grim Reaper. I guarantee you one of those alternate jurors gets called up to the majors with a quickness.

 

There are 12 jurors — I was the first pick somehow — and six alternates.

Well, now, five alternates.

One of the alternates had car trouble yesterday, showed up more than two hours late and was immediately detained. The cops took him downstairs and chained him to a chair for the remainder of the day. The judge made the guy come into the jury room during a break, apologize to everyone and then explain his situation. He may be sent to a court-approved work house for a couple days of duty there.

 

Tell me you're kidding, right?

 

I've had jury duty twice -- both civil cases -- and both were silly, waste-of-everyone's-time disputes that were settled in a day or two.

In one case I even knew one of the lawyers, but being an honest moron I answered no when asked if knowing the attoryney would affect my judgement.

My brother had to serve on a grand jury last year, which meant showing up at court every Wednesday for a couple of months.

 

I've served twice. Once while I was in college, once last month. Lots and lots of waiting, though I finally got on a jury last time. Of course, we didn't get called out of the assembly room until the second day, so I read three books while waiting for them to call us.

Frankly, I enjoyed it and I think it's a shame when people try to get out of it. The toothless and uneducated are NOT my peers, and if I should commit a crime someday, I want others like me on juries, not only those who were too stupid to get out of it.

 

If you're guilty, wouldn't you want a bunch of stupid jurors serving?

 

No, not kidding.

I didn't see that guy anywhere today and I don't plan to ask where he is. Of course, that guy's situation didn't stop one or two people from showing up 15 minutes late this morning. We are supposed to report at 9 a.m., and in three days so far we've started at 9:15, 9:45 and 9:20.

 

Last month when I served, there were two women who, at the lunch break, decided to go home and not return. Deputies located them, returned them to the courthouse and they were each slapped with $1,500 fines.

 

In my final year of college, I got a notice that my jury duties were suspended because the state ran out of money and had canceled court for the rest of the year (Sweet Home Alabama indeed). I was glad to get that notice, because I never got a first notice saying I had jury duty. Since I was about two weeks from moving to Louisiana, I was glad I was not going to be in serious trouble for not showing up for duty that I never knew I had.

When in HS, my Physics teacher said he was going to go into court and say, "When do we start hanging the n-------?" (Commence Alabama jokes if you must, but his kind are getting fewer).

Strangely, I never learned anything in that Physics class.