Not since Ali unmasked Foreman in Zaire...Telander knocks out Mariotti

Mariotti "fears for his safety" in the White Sox clubhouse?

You're a gash, Jay. A big whimpering, simpering vagina.

 

I know I am making the left turn toward the Coen brothers' wood chipper with this one, but.....

Why the repeated references to the female anatomy as some cornerstone of all that is weak and cowardly?

It stretches 10-20 times its normal size, and often is cut, to bring life into this world.

A penis is a much more "cowardly" piece of anatomy.

Is that anthropomorphism, or not?

Carry on.

 

Mariotti, though, has got to have some large stones to b able to continue to show his face, continue to opine and to appear on ATH. ...
Oh, wait, I forgot. He's a columnist. His ego is bigger than his stones.

 

CHICAGO (AP) -- An unidentified scientist at the University of Chicago continues research to find Jay Mariotti's gonads. The chairman of the biology department, Mr. Ozzie Telander, said the department will seek private research grants to find a microscope powerful enough to find Mariotti's testicles. "Like most atomic particles, we theoretically know they exist. Difficulty arises when we seek to identify them in their natural habitat," the chairman stated.

 

A well timed blow for Rick, Cubs-Sox at Wrigley this weekend.

 

I've never seen a columnist ripped in his own paper multiple times like that. Keep it up, lads.

I say Jay should tie one on and amble into the Sox clubhouse in a drunken stupor.

 

And, BTW, Telander years ago was on "Sportswriters on TV" (if he's still on it, I don't know because if the show is still produced, I have no access to it), which is better than any of the sportswriter pontification shows on now with the possible exception of PTI.

 

"Sportswriters on TV," in its prime, put the current genre to shame.

 

no need for a decoder ring... just wait about 20 years, you'll grow up and have the ability to decipher the non-obvious.

 

I guess I need a decoder ring, too.

Or maybe all the acid in the other Mariotti threads just made Telander's piece seem vanilla by comparison. I'll take Maureen Dowd vs. Judith Miller.

A decent column, but I just don't see the nuclear explosion in it that others do.

 

Maybe Whitlock or another major metro guy can enlighten me to this, but how many people (and how high up the food chain) probably read this column before it ran?
I am just asking, because in the Sun-Times office this morning the SE is either just waiting for Telander to show up and rip him a new one, or he's waiting to give him a cookie and say how good of a job he has been doing.

 

at my paper, the publisher would've read that column and a team of knight-ridder lawyers. it would've been filed by 3 p.m., fannin and i would've been on the phone back and forth from 5 to 7 p.m.