Ohio State-Michigan thread

It's semantics, but OSU has 6 Heisman winners (and going on 7, by the way), not 5 as someone indicated before.

If tOSU wins out, would beating three No. 2 teams in one season rank up there with the great college FB accomplishments? Where would it compare to it already being the only school ever to go 14-0 in a season?

How would the '02 Buckeyes do against the '06 Buckeyes?

 

Dunno, but keep asking those "how would they do against X team from the past" questions. That sure worked out well for USC last year.

 

Ohio State has five Heisman Trophy winners.

They have, however, combined for six Heismans.

So you're both right. Isn't that special?

SC beats Cal by 10, steamrolls ND and UCLA.

 

:-\

Good point.

 

I like that collage of Tressel and Woody, although accuracy requires me to note that the picture fails to include the $100 bill that is usually part of handshakes involving that school's coaches.

 

How would the '02 or '06 Buckeyes do against the '96 Wolverines ;D

 

Sometimes Wojo (Det version) mails it in... this one hits tongue in cheek predictions on the nose....

Bob Wojnowski

For OSU, it'll be spit, beer & tears

ANN ARBOR -- It's the biggest game in the history of the biggest rivalry, and we know what that means down in Ohio.

More booze! More spittle! More random Dumpster fires! More contraband-sniffing dogs! More creative uses of "%&*$#" and "sucks" in run-on sentences!

Woo-wee, this could be the best ever. And by "best ever," we technically mean "worst ever."

Listen. I tried to warn you people about this. I tried to tell you, as Michigan beat Ohio State year after year, that if the Wolverines ever let up and allowed the Buckeyes to stagger to their feet, they'd regret it.

Well, now take a look (but please, shield the children). The Buckeyes have won four of the past five meetings and are 11-0 and ranked No. 1. When they host underdog No. 2 Michigan on Saturday, it's expected to be the biggest day in Columbus since the invention of the deep fryer.

At the risk of being called an obnoxious twit with a column photo that adds 35 pounds to the jowls, I think it's fair to ask a simple question: Can the fine citizens down there handle this epic event better than they handle their beer?

It doesn't help that the game will start at 3:30 p.m., giving dedicated Buckeyes extra time to hang around and reminisce about all the rivalry's great moments, like the time in the mid-'80s when ol' Joe passed out right before kickoff. That was a good one.

Hey, it's not just me wondering. OSU officials, civic leaders, students, players and ex-players pleaded this week for better behavior. Columbus police have instituted tough new measures to avoid a repeat of what erupted after OSU's victory over U-M in 2002, when cars were tipped, couches were burned and buildings were vandalized, not that anyone could tell the difference. Some stores near campus have stopped selling beer in glass bottles, and officials say Dumpsters and trash cans will be emptied regularly so they don't catch on fire, accidentally of course.

Let me be clear on one thing. This rivalry is spectacular, and part of what makes it special is the bottomless passion of our little Buckeye friends. Really. Honestly. I'm not even patronizing as much as usual.

But the rivalry is too great to be defiled by stuff like this, by random violence, by public drunkenness, by Jim Tressel's squirrelly sweater vest, by four OSU victories in five years. It's just not necessary, and I think most Buckeyes would agree, once it was explained to them what "defiled" means.

 

Crazy in Columbus

Yes, U-M fans can get ridiculous, too, although they save most of their expletives for Lloyd Carr's play-calling. But there's no doubt it's crazier in Columbus, partly because the Buckeyes have nothing else to distract them, no other major rivals, no other major teams to follow, no silly concerns about "academics," no important social or economic issues to worry about, like saving the whales or saving the auto industry.

I have tried and tried over the years to objectively detail the differences between Buckeyes and Wolverines, while imploring both sides to get along. I've done my part, and there are indications progress is being made. For instance, this was an actual e-mail I received, among several hundred, last year: "Hey Bob, we hate you, too, fat b------. We shall be victorious! And your picture looks like you're chewing cud."

OK, that was a little startling, considering teams of experts worked for hours on that photo. But I shouldn't be surprised. I understand in Columbus, cud is considered an acceptable substitute for tobacco. U-M fans who venture down there should check out the various cud concession stands outside Ohio Stadium.

See? Just like that I got dragged into the nastiness, for no good reason.

This needs to change, just a little. The competition on the field between the Wolverines and Buckeyes is always spirited, respectful and wonderfully intense. Off the field? Uh, not so much.

U-M fans aren't blameless, either. I've seen cases where Wolverines arrogantly wore their school colors in Columbus and sometimes even cheered out loud. And I understand many brazenly drive down there -- get this -- in their very own cars with Michigan license plates. Boy, that's pretty dumb. You have a Michigan license plate, you might as well have a sign that states, "Vandalize me! It's OK! I'm insured!"

My advice for U-M fans is to place something in the rear window of your car to indicate you might actually be a Buckeye. Anything from a scarlet sweatshirt to crushed beer cans to scattered pork rinds should work.

Take a deep breath

Time out for the annual lightbulb jokes.

Q: How many Buckeyes does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: 100,000. One to shoot out the old lightbulb with a rifle and 99,999 to cheer and shout, "Michigan suuuuuuuuuuuccks!"

Q: How many Wolverines does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: Four. One to change the light bulb, one to protest against lightbulb companies exploiting under-aged foreign workers, one to crack open an Amstel Light and one to whine about the officiating.

Now, while we await this collision between two great teams, perhaps we should all step back and take a deep breath. And I mean everyone, on both sides.

It's rude that former U-M star Chris Perry railed on the Buckeyes, calling coach Jim Tressel a cheater. It's lame that former OSU quarterback Kirk Herbstreit referred to a U-M player as "worthless." It's amazing that a band called the Dead Schembechlers will host a Hate Michigan rally today in Columbus, and that seems as normal as anything.

And yes, it was an astonishingly classless stunt two years ago, when OSU let bomb-sniffing dogs loose on U-M's equipment truck and searched players' bags, and then Tressel fibbed about his knowledge of it. Hey, fellas, leave the stupid punk moves to the media, OK? Don't make me pull out a cheap shot about former Buckeye part-time employee Maurice Clarett, currently enhancing his OSU education behind bars.

This should be a fun week. It should not be a time when U-M officials are planning to send campus police to Columbus, while e-mailing cryptic warnings to students and alums. Among the written suggestions to U-M fans were to "stay with a group" and "don't draw unnecessary attention to yourself." My goodness. Is this a football game or a trip into the backwoods where the banjo players live? (Don't answer).

Eventually, reportedly, there will be a football game, a classic Big Ten clash between traditional powers, and even if it doesn't fulfill all the hype, it should shut up the Southern football snobs for a while. The good news is, if there's a rematch for the national title, it'll be held in genteel Arizona, where they can't even spell "%&*$#."

As usual, this game will come down to the standard football clichés. It'll be won by who wants it the most and who turns the ball over the least, and also by who puts their pants on one leg at a time, zipper in front, preferably.

The Buckeyes want this so bad, they could just belch. The Wolverines need it worse, with Carr an unseemly 1-4 against Tressel. U-M's defenders are so sick of being reminded that OSU quarterback Troy Smith has run all over them, I think they might actually do something about it.

It should be a dandy. Someone guard the Dumpsters.

Pick: U-M, 20-17.

You can reach Bob Wojnowski at bob.wojnowski@detnews.com.

 

This game getting all the hype.

Cal-USC will be far more entertaining.

 

If this game is close (w/in a touchdown either way), a rematch is not nearly as unlikely as some seem to believe.

The loser's only loss will have been a close defeat to the #1 team in the country, so you can't drop them very far in the human polls (especially since some of the other teams lost to unranked or lower-ranked teams). And both Michigan and Ohio State are very strong in the computers. Tomorrow's loser would need some help to get into the championship game, but it might only be one or teams losing.

Remember in 2003 - undefeated Oklahoma got its ass kicked by Kansas State in the Big 12 championship game yet still made it into the championship game when the final rankings were announced the next night. Why? Because the Sooners only fell to 3rd in the human polls and were so strong in the computers that they still stayed in front.

So it can happen.

 

We've got off the record that Bo Schembechler, taken to a hospital after collapsing for the second time in a month, had no pulse upon arrival.

 

I suspect you're right.