On Luck

I don't think I did Lizzy a great favour. I'm just glad she got to the hospital and didn't knock her teeth out. But yes, whatever I did for her, she has rattled me to my core in exchange. I have a friend who fosters children with his wife—they're some of best people I know—and I was thinking of them when I was in the waiting room with Lizzy. Now that's a great favour. I don't do nearly enough to make the world better.

 

A lot of people would have kept on driving.

 

I don't think that's true. A lot of people wouldn't have gone to the lengths detailed here, but I believe most people would have stopped initially at such a scene.

 

A friend fostered a child for two years and ended up "losing" an adoption battle. I sometimes wonder how she can cope. To do what she did takes something most of us don't have.

 

Fair enough. I was behind a head-on car crash on New Year's Eve. It was snowing and one car slid across the median and the two cars collided and then slid together through a wire retaining fence that kept them from slipping into a marsh. I stopped. The kid who'd been coming the other direction was about 20 and freaking out, apologizing. I parked, put on my hazards -- a two-lane road in the snow through a marsh by an airport; not a safe place to stop (or crash) -- and walked up to the other car. Airbags deployed, women in front seat screaming in Spanish, two kids in backseat, one with an obvious broken thumb. The driver, a man, spoke English, and said everyone seemed relatively fine. I hung around for five minutes or so until the first cop car arrived, followed soon after by an ambulance. At that point I was just in the way, so I split. My feeling was it just as easily could have been me who slid across the road or was hit head-on. We know neither the time or place; tomorrow is promised to no one.

 

I believe that, too. The rest of it, I don't really feel like I had a choice. She needed to go to the hospital. I was the only way for her to get there short of an ambulance. It's ten minutes away. Of course I took her. Then once we got there, she cried and asked me to stay. Of course I stayed. It was all pretty automatic. I think the vast, vast majority of people would have done the same.

None of this thread was meant to be about me. Writing the initial post was my way of venting last night. I was looking for ideas on how to help, like @Songbird and lunch. And I guess I was hoping to convey that when you're lucky, you need to be grateful for it.

Watching that kid fall... Like, she was just on her way home from school, to go play video games or whatever. Ordinary day. One false step, in exactly the wrong place, and whammo. I mean, it sounds like she's going to recover, but that could have really been bad. In an instant. And that can happen to any of us. Seeing that blood pour out of her—it really was like a faucet—was pretty fucking sobering. And I was just supposed to be taking my kid swimming. Had I left my house 30 seconds sooner, Lizzy's fall would have happened behind me. I wouldn't have had any idea.

 

How much did the big fluffy towel end up costing you?

 

It was $40! I was just writing up an invoice for Lizzy's mom.

I was just thinking what I would have done if my ex couldn't have picked up my eldest yesterday. Not sure how that would have played out. Still feel bad I missed swimming.

 

I think I'll figure that out first, just what the options are. If there is a paid lunch available, then that's probably easiest, right? Just write a cheque for the rest of the year and don't say anything to mom? Maybe you're right.

Find out what's up, put something on the board or just give me your address via a PM and I'll throw in $20, that should cover a couple weeks. Maybe we all can fund a couple lunch programs there.

We've all had people help us along the way. It's cliche but it never hurts to pay it forward.

 

Because this was described as a small town, yes. People would have stopped. Not many would have stopped in a bigger town, from my experience.

 

Thanks for sharing. Restores some of my faith in humanity and the world we live in. There are still good, thoughtful people out there. I know that wasn't your point, and my heart breaks for the girl and her family, but I'm glad to hear that some stil see and understand how the world works and have a desire to change it.

 

In early December, I was walking down the street in DC and about a half block in front of me, I saw a woman standing by herself fall to the ground. A few people closer to her than me saw it happen, too, and kept walking. By the time I got to her, a man and a woman had stopped to check on her. She was conscious and talking but seemed a little out of it. I stayed to see if I could help and ended up being the one to call 911 and flag down the fire truck. By the time the paramedics arrived, a few other people came by to see what was going on, but I couldn't believe how many people saw the initial fall and did nothing.