Random Thoughts the Third

If you're still looking for the seven additional clowns, I'm in.

 

Copper -- Was the Kringle from O&H bakery in Racine? That place is fantastic. They make a chocolate cherry version at Christmas that is just unbelievable.

And I can't believe you actually made one. Seems obscenely difficult. I would like you to be my Secret Santa this year.

 

Please dress exactly as your avatar. It's perfect.

 

He's not wearing pants in the full picture.

 

I would hope not.

 

How you doin'?

 

I believe it was from O&H. The version I made was a straight braid instead of a circle, which probably made it easier, but the braiding was still time-consuming until I'd done it a few times and gotten the hang of it. The dough is actually very simple, just flour, sour cream and butter.

Chocolate cherry sounds delicious. I will definitely have to remember that combination.

 

In bed, eating Kringle.

 

That's inappropriate.

 

Ever wish you were a sea captain?

Ever wish you were a sea captain on a trawler bound for a distant land?

Ever wish you were a sea captain on a trawler bound for a distant land to take Mayor McCheese from McDonald Land on a diplomatic mission to the Land of Product Placement Stuffed Animals?

And that the ruler of the Land of Product Placement Stuffed Animals was this guy?



And that this guy, benign and cute looking though he is, was actually a tyrant whose favorite mode of humiliating his subjects was to swing around his tiny blue dick and whack them in their expressionless anthropomorphic faces?

Only because of his body proportion, he had to sit on his victims faces to do it?

And those political prisoners he chose to execute had to be thrown off a high tower over and over again because, well, they're stuffed animals and they're hard to kill?

And that en route to the Land Of Product Placement Stuffed Animals, as a neutral vessel, you had to avoid the war between Generic Oreo Cookies and Non-Generic Oreos?

And that the war began when "real" Oreos began to lord over the fake Oreos and claim racial superiority. Even though "fake" Oreos had developed a culture all their own, most notably at Aldi and Dollar General stories nationwide?

And did you ever think that all of this took place inside the molecule of a drunken belch from a 300-pound 50-year-old man getting a blow job from a 400-pound 60-year old hooker?

Did you ever think about that?

 

What if all of the food you ate had a sex organ on it? Would you still eat it?

 

I think there was a Peter Gabriel-era Genesis song about this subject.

Paging SamMills to the white courtesy phone ...