RIP Junior Seau

I would understand a little more when it comes to a player who will be forgotten the second he retires. That was never going to be the case for Seau, but that doesn't mean it was any easier for him to take.

 

Seau's former teammate, Gary Plummer, suggests mandatory retirement counseling for all players. Plummer also has a headline-grabber: He says that according to current protocols, in which "seeing stars" is a Grade 1 concussion, a linebacker like him or Seau would have had probably 1,500 concussions.

http://www.mercurynews.com/breaking-news/ci_20542619/former-seau-teammate-gary-plummer-he-was-crying

That's obviously a huge part of the problem, deciding what is and isn't a concussion. I mean, they would never finish a season if everything was defined that stringently. But the idea that Seau NEVER had a concussion is just insane.

 

It bothers me that people are talking about this suicide as if it was caused by concussions. I highly doubt it.

Suicide is a selfish, attention-getting and emotional but purposeful response to a lack of inner strength or ability to cope with whatever circumstances have arisen to bring a person to that point. It is usually depression-driven or brought on by something for which a person sees no hope, solution or resolution.

I can only wonder what there was in Seau's life that would fit that description...to the point that he'd text his ex-wife and kids that "I love you," one day, and then shoot himself the next (god, I feel for those left behind) -- other than, maybe, his loss of identity that may have come with the loss of football.

I wouldn't read too much into Seau's shooting himself in the chest instead of blowing his brains out, either, unless there's some note or message that's been left to the effect that he was doing that specifically so his brain could be studied. Otherwise, his brain just as easily could have been studied when he died of more natural causes. Couldn't it?

Shooting yourself in the chest can be conceived and perceived more as an "injury" than can blowing your brains out. It would take a lot of guts to do that if you are thinking at all (as Seau apparently was, if he was cognizant enough to be messaging his family and planning this) and if you do it, there is likely much more of a real sense that "you," or the essence of "you," does not exist anymore, and never did. Someone may feel like they want to die, but that is not the same as wishing they never existed.

To my knowledge, Seau wasn't like Dave Deuerson in speaking or acting out previously about concerns over concussions, and he wasn't a guy for whom that was a "cause."

Seau's family is probably giving an OK to do a brain study as a post-death decision not unlike donating any other parts of a deceased person's body. I doubt they really believe that a concussion brought on this suicide.

And I doubt that is what will be found as a result of any study.

 

Then why did he shoot himself in the chest?

Not to be morbid, but I have to think that was symbolic because if all he wanted was to die, the quickest way is through the head. How often do you hear about someone shooting themself in the chest?

Just typing that gave me chills...

I just wonder if he was experiencing problems and found out that it was only going to get worse... Maybe he didn't want to let himself get to the level where Duerson was.

 

Good points by Elliotte, LTL and Write Thinking. There may very well be several factors involved: Concussions, family issues, financial issues (last time I was in San Diego, about eight years ago, there was a restaurant/sports bar with his name on it near the Murpy), and, to oversimplify, NFL postpartum blues.

Seau's family will allow his brains to be examined, I understand. I hope that in any postmortem exams, all factors are weighed, instead of this being rubberstamped "concussions" as the sole reason.

 

The researchers say concussions -- or CTE if you prefer, since that is more of the general damage to the brain and not necessarily related to what we'd call a concussion -- can cause depression.

 

Maybe he didn't have the guts to do that? Maybe he didn't really want to die?

I don't know. No one ever will, barring some new evidence or news.

But I have little doubt that, had he said more than "I love you," in those texts to the family, and had he given anyone a chance to talk him out of any suicide attempt, they probably would have been able to do it.

Wanting to kill, either others or self, is usually a very temporary thought process. That's why the wait period to buy guns, that's why people try to talk people down, etc. Most people don't truly want to kill themselves. In fact, they are not realizing or truly understanding exactly what that even really means -- that it's final, permanent, irreversible, done, The End.

If they'd get it, they wouldn't do it.

If Seau thought his mother was, or is, ever going to react differently than the horribly heart-wrenching way she did, he wouldn't have done it. If he truly understood that his kids -- whom he purposely texted that he loved -- will never see him again, ever, he woudn't have done it.

 

I guess we'll just have to wait and see, then.

Don't get me wrong. I don't think people should be playing football too much or too soon after experience concussions, and it's not that I doubt that they are serious injuries.

But I have studied psychology -- I have a degree in it, along with journalism -- and I have some experience with depression and the treatment of it, myself, and, in that experience, suicide is more a failure to cope, and a failure of strength/courage/personal development, and, in the end, a failure of self-responsibility, than anything else.

 

Agreed. I wish people thought like that before they kept a gun in their house for any reason. A guy I played football with in high school got dumped by his girlfriend and found out she'd had an abortion. His dad was threatening to send him to military school. He went to the attic, found one of his dad's guns and killed himself.

If it's not there... Who knows?

I hate guns. I hate stories about people killing themselves.

 

You have some nerve. I lost my brother to suicide, and my brother was more of a man that just about anyone I've ever met. He was smart and successful and torn up that his job required him to spend a lot of time with his family. At the same time, he was worried that quitting would put his family in a devastating financial hole. It wouldn't have, but with depression clouding his thoughts and judgment, that was what he thought and felt. He was a wreck the last couple of weeks of his life. He would call my mom from work in tears. I have no doubt that a large part of the reason he committed suicide was that he thought he'd be doing everyone a favor.

He could not have been more wrong.

So you have a psych degree. Good for you. That gives you no right to sit in judgment. You want to know what kind of man my brother was? He never would have written a post like that.

Sorry, Moddy, I know this thread wasn't supposed to devolve into this.

 

Write, I agree with parts of this, except that last graf. There are many people who do know exactly what their suicide will do to their loved ones. I've known people like this. They do know it's over, the end. They do know their kids will never see them again, that their parents will want to die the second they get the news.

They know all of that, but it doesn't matter, because the depression is too much, is too overwhelming and powerful. They want that pain to end, even if they know what will be left behind.

I have no idea if that was Seau. But I do know it's many people.

 

Sorry for your loss, cp, but that explanation seems to support WT's posts about coping.