SJ.COM All-purpose dating thread

Re: SJ dating Nation, I could use some input.

Cry me a river, Granny.

 

Re: SJ dating Nation, I could use some input.

Sorry Flash. It's been a bad day. I jumped the gun. Seriously.

 

Re: SJ dating Nation, I could use some input.

Flash: you're right; no hard-and-fast rule for grieving over a breakup. But I think it's a good guideline -- and too many people (I've done it too) tend to dwell for too long and/or don't have anyone pushing them to take back their lives. It can be a vicious cycle. Yes, you have to grieve -- but you also have to get over it.

 

Re: SJ dating Nation, I could use some input.

This may be completely obvious, but is anyone else finding that people (or maybe those in my just my age group) are increasingly turned off by the prospect of a relationship?

 

Re: SJ dating Nation, I could use some input.

It's been three years.
Haunts me when I'm awake, taunts me when I'm asleep.
That's the last place, the final fig leaf — the dreams.
Three fucking year, and I can't not think about her. Over her? Yeah, I'm over her. I recognize that there were fundamental flaws in our relationship that couldn't be overcome. So be it.
She had a $9 million house, and I lived in an apartment from the time I was four. She ate Ruths Chris twice a month; I ate Outback for a great meal.
I wanted to be a sportswriter, she wanted me to work for her dad's company. You want irony? Now, three years after we broke up, I'm getting out of the profession. What a damn waste.
You're not alone, my friend. If it takes a year, if it takes five years, then so be it. So be it. I've moved on as much as I can — there are other love interests now, after blocking myself away for three years, unwilling to face the fact that I could love and lose again.
But you don't think it hurts when I see her stupid fucking facebook updates, after she added me as a friend...again...and I accepted ... again...You don't think it hurts when I think of the milestones I've missed? You don't think it hurts when I see my best friend getting married on Saturday and my other three best friends in long term relationships and my ex on the verge of an engagement? Fuck yeah it hurts.
So be it.

 

Re: SJ dating Nation, I could use some input.

Why would you torture yourself by adding her as a Facebook friend, GB?

 

Re: SJ dating Nation, I could use some input.

I was thinking the same thing.

 

Re: SJ dating Nation, I could use some input.

Because, I figured, at least then I wouldn't have to go through it again, and knowing her, I would. I, of course, didn't expect a picture comment within five minutes of adding her, but oh well. We chatted for the first time in a while, and it was fine.

 

Re: SJ dating Nation, I could use some input.

And yet "bone it like you own it" is considered sage advice?

I just hope Dr. Phil ain't reading this.

 

Re: SJ dating Nation, I could use some input.

Go through what again? You're keeping a constant reminder of her and the pain she caused you.

What's with people putting words in my mouth today? I've never said that either.

 

Re: SJ dating Nation, I could use some input.

I said it, and it was supposed to be a joke.

 

Re: SJ dating Nation, I could use some input.

You know, I've never felt like I've asked for a lot in a significant other. There's certain things that attract me to a particular woman, and I felt like I had what I wnted with my ex and she broke my heart.

It hasn't stopped me from living my life. I would love nothing more than to move on and get with another woman who respects the way I treat them and appreciates what I do for them. I don't feel that that makes it wrong to still miss my ex.