The ex who won't go away (and won't/can't let go)

You redneck sonuvabitch. That shirt was burgundy, or perhaps eggplant, but it sure as shit wasn't purple.

The flowers were white, however, so I'll give you that.

 

Don't listen to Rosie, she's channeling your mom

Bone it like you own it.

 

Spaceman, don't make me ground you!

 

Tell her you have a future with JRC

 

Who wears an eggplant shirt? Where the fuck do you shop, Jonesy?

 

Although I believe in the spoiled-milk theory, I have ignored it on more than once occassion.

 

I laughed out loud at that

 

Hey, you're SportsJournalists.com royalty. I thought the purple shirt was appropriate.

 

Yeah. She'll turn the most trivial question into a full-fleged, throw-down of a debate, complete with whining, wailing, anything to get her way, even though she knows she wasn't hurt in the least by the trivial question to begin with. Five minutes after the melee starts, it'll be forgotten forever. Miraculous recovery, or a great sell? You be the judge.

Then you'll only be allowed to score once every 10 days or so. It's fun when it happens, because there's much celebration. You want more, of course, but she'll claim that you just don't get the 'beauty' of the relationship. The art is in the set up, not the act itself.

Yup... a soccer-loving significant other sounds like a great time. Where can I sign up?

 

Ding!

And what Rosie said. All of it.