The Right Way to Walk on Eggshells

Gotta agree with that. You don't owe them much and nothing more. Having said that, if your boss has gone the extra mile for you in the past and is a decent person to you, it's nice to let them know.

Essentially, your job search is (supposed to be) in your personal time and is none of their fucking business.

 

I think this shows more than anything, not everyone is fortunate enough to have a good boss. I had three excellent bosses before I had my first shitty one. And the one shitty one really made my life hell.
We all can't get lucky with a bunch of kind-hearted souls as bosses, and Moddy, you read like you'd be one of the good ones.
I hope I become one of the good ones when that time comes.
But we've also read threads about some real assholes.

 

I believe you, Moddy. But it is unrealistic to believe every manager plays by the same rulebook you do. They don't. People have to evaluate the specific dynamics of their workplace and make their own decision.

 

I agree that this situation is always a case-by-case basis, because it depends on your relationship with your boss, but I'll stand by Moddy on this:

Don't let your boss get blindsided.

That's just a slap in the face. Be a professional about it. And the professional thing to do is to give your boss a heads-up if they might receive a phone call.

That said, make your own decision. You know your boss better than we do. But, as a rule, be up-front until you're forced not to.

 

Well, I'll change my perspective slightly. You probably need to say something for the phone call to the editor. But you certainly don't need to tell your boss you're looking if you don't think it will be handled well. Waiting until you are going for the interview is a good move.

 

I agree with that completely. If it's moved past the interview stage and on to the references stage, that's when you let someone know. I wouldn't before that, though. There's likely nothing good that can come of letting your boss know you're looking elsewhere.

 

Of course.

If you're looking, it's nobody's business. If you send a resume, it's nobody's business.

But if there's an interview, then you're far enough along in the process that you should expect that your employer will find out about it. Because they will -- it's a small world. Better that you let them know yourself, before somebody else does.

 

In fairness to Moddy, I will usually tell my section editor - which Moddy was - that I'm looking. Obviously I need to trust that person not to tell the higher ups, but I did in most cases, and I'm not very easy on editors so that's saying a lot.

IMO, telling a section editor does two things. 1. It avoids the blindside and 2. gives the section editor, if he really wants you to stay, a chance to wrangle you a better deal, say more money or a better title.

He can do that without telling the eds. you're trying to leave. He can go to the ee or me and say, 'We need to do this for Write-Brained because I'm worried we might lose him."

If he can't wrangle you a better deal, than in most cases he'll understand why you need to leave.

But this prospective employer in the initial post did the total asshole thing by calling the current boss. That's completely wrong. My only explanation is that the two guys knew each other, which is definitely a risk.

Don't be afraid to tell prospective employers that you want to keep your interest on the down-low.

 

I would think most perspective employers do (or ought to) know that most job seekers would want to keep their interest on the down-low.

If my current full-time reporter were looking for another job and I saw evidence of the same, I'd call her into my office and let her know that she'd need to be more careful about doing so. I'd make it clear that I don't mind that she's looking, but I'd also make it clear that letting it be known is putting your current job in jeopardy.

When the guy I've mentioned before who took over for me while I was having cancer surgery was coming back to work as a freelancer for a short time, I told him flat out to use me as a reference. Even if he'd come back full time, I'd give him a great reference.

I try to shoot straight with the people who work for and with me. But more importantly, I try to do right by them.

 

Yeah but its not like one would go to the potential employer and say: Hey, what did so and so say about me.

You know?

 

If you're making an effort to better the situation for you and/or your family and somebody holds that against you, that somebody is the dick. Not you.