Things you do that other people think are weird

i put ranch on a couple of hotdogs last night and it was surprisingly ok

 

That is one of the most obscene things I've ever heard/read.
How do you live with yourself?

 

-- In tennis, I serve left handed and switch to my right hand for groundstrokes.

-- I almost always order last when I am out at a restaurant, whether I'm with just my wife or a group. I never decide until the waiter asks me. Drives my wife insane -- recently, I've been better when I'm out with just her.

-- I have collar stays in about 10 locations in my office and house. I hate the way that a shirt looks when the collar flies up and I am always losing the stays. so I bought like 1,000 of them on eBay a couple of years ago and I have packs of them everywhere.

 

i'm thinking of buying some cashews on the way home to dip in ranch

 

I like to take cell-phone pictures of my dick (zoom comes in handy) and send them to strangers.

 

I can't stand ranch. Nor can I stand sour cream. My daughter would eat both by the spoonful if I let her.

 

Not only do I detest shrimp, I'm allergic to it.

Used to peel it way back when I worked at a Long John Silver's. My eyes puffed up so bad they were forced shut.

Personally, I thought raw they smelled like wet Chihuahuas.

 

I refuse to go anywhere near anything that looks, smells or seems sour: sour cream, ranch dressing, buttermilk, even cheesecake. Eww.

And cottage cheese is one of the most unsightly things on this earth. Looks like year-old milk with a different label. Gawd.

Which reminds me, I check expiration dates on milk religiously. If it's not fresh, I can't stand it. If the milk has expired, I don't even want to smell it. To me, milk smells spoiled to begin with; I don't need the stress if it's expired.

All that said, when I was a kid I would come home from school every day and make a mayonnaise sandwich. Go figure.

And don't get me started on eggs. If they're in cakes, etc., I'm OK, but I won't go near one otherwise. Fried, scrambled, boiled (eww), deviled (double eww). In fact, my mother said when she was pregnant with me, every time she ate eggs, she threw up.

 

Hen cum! Aaaah!!! - George Carlin.

 

I too am anal about expiration dates. I don't care what it is, if the date has passed, I won't eat it.

 

Disliking a food to which you are alergic does not count as weird.

 

-- I refuse to use exclamation points.
-- I like to poop with the door open (yeah, I live alone)