This songs matters to me, because: (your explanation here)

This is an awesome thread.

 

I point out that, as near as I can tell, this great thread is bereft of the ladies of SportsJournalists.com.

 

Nope, SC already left her mark. Oops, made her mark.

 

Okay, I've got a few.

Jet, by Paul McCartney and Wings because it reminds me of beg with my Dad when I was a little kid.

"All I Wants it You" by U2 because it was playing the first time I, you know...

"Question" by the Old 97s, and "All the Right Reasons" because they're mine and Mrs. Slydell's songs."

"F Tha Police" by NWA and "Buddy" by DeLa Soul remind me of high school.

 

Fine, since I apparently don't count as a woman, y'all get to read another one, soaked in estrogen.

"Not A Pretty Girl" - Ani DiFranco
I am not a pretty girl
that is not what I "do"
I ain't no damsel in distess
and I don't need to be rescued
so put me down punk
maybe you'd prefer a maiden fair
isn't there a kitten stuck up a tree somewhere

I am not an angry girl
but it seems like I've got everyone fooled
every time I say something they find hard to hear
they chalk it up to my anger
and never to their own fear
and imagine you're a girl
just trying to finally come clean
knowing full well they'd prefer you
were dirty and smiling

and I am sorry
I am not a maiden fair
and I am not a kitten stuck up a tree somewhere

...

I am not a pretty girl
I don't want to be a pretty girl
no I want to be more than a pretty girl


This song is important because it gave me a vocabulary.

Just the first two lines -- "I'm not a pretty girl, that is not what I do" -- made it OK for me to be who I am, not who I am not. I don't "do" pretty, or cute, or helpless, or whatever. I want to be more than that.

As a kid it was very hard for me to articulate what I was thinking and feeling. "Every time I say something they find hard to hear/they chalk it up to my anger/and never to their own fear" seemed to explain why people would have the "wrong" reactions to me. I learned that if something was wrong, it might not be my fault, it might be theirs.

 

Since F_B wants more from the girls, I'll go again!

As some of you may have noticed from my posts, I have a man I call dad and I have a biological father. My dad has provided me with most of the positive images of fatherhood and masculinity in my life. My father, who abandoned my mother and I when I was 9 months old for another woman and who was screwing around on mom while she was pregnant, didn't want to be burdened with a child, while that was all my Dad wanted (the woman he dated before mom had 5 kids, just saying).

As I grew older and I started to do things because I thought that's what boys wanted to me to be (i.e. trying out for the cheerleading squad, pretending I wasn't good at math, refusing to read anything but romance novels at schools so nobody knew I was reading Thomas Hardy and the Bronte sisters in middle school), it frustrated him to no end. He kept trying to tell me that trying to be someone I wasn't wouldn't make me happier. Sure, I might have a few more friends, but I also could turn into somebody I didn't like. This song, although not about that specifically, reminds me of my dad's advice.

If I ever get married, this will be the father-daughter dance song, and I will dance with my dad and not my biological father.

 

Girl, that song is amazing. Chilling to hear her sing it. I never thought of it as a father-daughter song, but it fits so well.

 

One of the beauties of music is that the same set of lyrics can mean something different to everyone who hears them. The first I heard that song, I thought it would be a great father-daughter song.

Mind you I also want this one Alanis song played as the first dance, so maybe I just have odd taste in wedding music

 

I am now properly reproved.
As a stepdad myself, sc, I love your story.

 

My songs may have sucked, Fenian, but I did post them. They were just overshadowed by the powerful posts of buckweaver and jgmacg.

 

I am full of misogynist fail this morning.

 

Wait ... there's something special about this morning?