What the movies taught you about sports

DanOregon wins the thread and goes home with a sombrero full of peanuts.

 

The Vista View Apartments ain't got no vista, ain't got no view and they sure as hell ain't got no vista of no view.

 

There is no law in the arena; many are killed.

 

Never count out Raquel Welch in a match race.

 

When you're racing, it's life. Anything that happens before or after is just waiting.

 

That the NHL will send the New York Rangers to Alaska for an exhibition game in the middle of the season.

 

And don't forget, you can play in a pro-am and get into a brawl with Bob Barker and still not get yourself thrown off the tour because a PR person you're dating convinces the tour director that golf needs a working-class hero.

 

That if you want to motivate your star football player, wreck his car, deface it with graffiti, and blame the opposition.

 

If you're stocking up to compete in an illegal cross country auto race, take several cases of beer and a bag of barbecue chips. And watch out for Captain Chaos.

 

LACES OUT! ALLLL-RIGHTTTYYY THENNN!

 

That just because your husband came home from World War II, your teammates are OK with you quitting your team on the eve of the World Series, even though you're the star player and it would only be a few extra days.

 

I know this thread, and this post is meant in fun. But I'd bet $20 that an entire generation of kids (myself included) learned that laces in is a leading cause of missed field goals on all levels of football. Every time I'm covering a game and there's a kick, that's what I look for the holder to do, and if it misses I blame the holder not the kicker.
Thank you, Ace Ventura. You both entertained AND informed.