What's the closest you've come to nuking yourself?

Should I watch Beaches or Steel Magnolias?

Or should I take a different tack and go motivational, maybe throw on some Helen Reddy?

Calgon ... take me awaaaay!

 

Never. I like it here.

 

Not bad.

But if I wanted to replicate an old A_F-BYH feud, I'd name my top 10 Billy Squier songs and purposely fail to mention Rock Me Tonite. Then post something like, "I'm not into that prancing shit" and leave it at that, inviting the inevitable BYH (and Junkie) slamdown to come.

That's how those feuds usually rolled.

 

As a recovering self-nuker -- My name is Chris and I've nuked myself -- I feel the need to post on this thread, even though I think it might turn into one of those threads that make people think about nuking themselves.

When I blew myself up, I was going through a bit of a tough patch in real life. My wife and I were having trouble having a baby, and my gutted house was looking like a shitpile, and I felt like I was in a bit of a work slump. I came here to distract myself from those things.

But then -- and I'm not quite sure if it was just the mood I was in (whether I was looking for trouble), or whether the board really was in a particularly shitty phase -- this place became less like an antidote and more like the venom. I'd be enraged by what people were saying to each other and how many idiots were polluting the joint, so many basement gangsters. And one night, after a bad day off-board, I watched a rare feel-good thread suddenly turn nasty, and I was livid. I mean, punching-the-walls angry.

And then I was like, I'm volunteering to read this stuff? I'm getting in fights with strangers over the Internet? How low a life is that?

So I quit. Cold turkey. Didn't even lurk, probably for more than a year.

Then life got better. We had our baby. The house became liveable. Work got better. And I came back, resolved not to get sucked into any of the bullshit, just to take the good from this place -- and try to contribute only good to it -- and to find here the company that a writer working alone in his attic sometimes feels the need for.

I think, then, in some ways, your "board life" mirrors your real life. Things look good from where you're sitting, things look good here. Things look shitty, and you find the shit here. The stronger you swing toward the bad end of things, the more likely you are to nuke yourself.

In some very weird, psychosocial way, it's almost like half-assed suicide. It's at least like wiping some part of the slate clean.

I don't regret having done it. I'm glad I'm back, though, even in the relatively small doses I allow myself. I missed it, and I'm grateful for the do-over.

If nothing else, I think I learned that this place is more important to a lot of the people here than most of us would like to admit. And I include myself in that.

 

Get a room.

 

I nuked once.

Once.

 

Don't nuke yourself too much. You'll grow hair on your palms.
Ask Chris the bastard.

 

It's become so for me, too. I take no shame in admitting it.

I can get into "conversations" here that I wouldn't in day-to-day life. Whether it's politics, or being a journalist and everything that involves, or obscure '80s bands.

Damn, I'd miss it if it were gone. I need to send Webby more $$$ soon.

 

Some things are so serious as to never be joked about.

You, Sportschick, have crossed the line. :'(

 

My cat can kick your cat's ass too

 

You know what? You're right.

I go the other way from Jones. When things are difficult in my life, I tend to come here more often as an escape. I won Member of the Year in '05 when my wife and I lost two children to miscarriages (and I lost two grandparents, and my sister had major health problems with her second child) because of a rare disease. As I said at the time, this place was a sort of therapy for me and I meant that very sincerely, which is why I have strong feelings for this place and the majority of the regulars on it.

Which is why I'm perplexed that I nearly did the nuke.

But in the end, I didn't, so I suppose this is all boring self-analysis.

 

Duh! I knew that!