What's your favorite Seinfeld line?

Susan's father is now standing in the hallway)

MR. ROSS: The box! (Rushes toward George, grabbing the box away from him, then the letters from Susan's hands) My letters! Gimme that! (Now holding them

against his chest, defensively) Who told you to open this?!

MRS. ROSS: (Hysterical) Who's John?! Who's John?!

SARA: (Yelling out) I knew it!

MRS. ROSS: I want to know who John is!

RICKEY: John Cheever?! Dad, you and John Cheever?!

MR. ROSS: (Proclaiming) Yes! Yes, he was the most wonderful person I've ever known. And I love him deeply! In a way you could never understand.. (Slowly

walks back to his room, leaving everyone speechless. Susan seems to be affected the most. A long pause passes. Jerry gives George a signal that they should go)

 

That look is incredibly horrifying, like he's looking into Mrs. Ross' soul.

 

(After Newman tries to eat a piece of broccoli)

"Vile weed!"

 

The Jimmy:

George: Well, seems it's about time for George's lunch.
Stein: Yes it is. Well, let's see what I have today. Darn it. It's ham and cheese again, and she forgot the fancy mustard. I told her I like that fancy mustard. You could put that fancy mustard on a shoe and it would taste pretty good to me. Oh! She made it up with a cupcake, though. Hey, look at this: you know I got a new system for eating these things. I used to peel off the chocolate; now I turn them upside down. I eat the cake first and save the frosting for the end. It's almost like its own dessert.

 

Step off!

 

KRAMER: Oh...yeah. I got my new plates. But they mixed them up. Somebody got mine and I got their *vanity* plates.

GEORGE: What do they say?

KRAMER: Assman.

JERRY: Assman?

KRAMER: Yeah. Assman, Jerry. I'm Cosmo Kramer, the Assman!

JERRY: Who would order a license plate that says "Assman"?

GEORGE: Maybe they're Wilt Chamberlain's.

JERRY: It doesn't have to be someone who gets a lot of women. It could be just some guy with a big ass.

KRAMER: Yeah, or it could be a proctologist.

JERRY: Yeah. Proctologist.

GEORGE: Come on! No doctor would put that on his car.

KRAMER: Have you ever *met* a proctologist? Well, they usually have a very good sense of humor. You meet a proctologist at a party, don't walk away. *Plant* yourself there, because you will hear the funniest stories you've ever heard. See, no one wants to admit to them that they *stuck* something up there. Never! It's always an accident. Every proctologist story ends in the same way: "It was a million to one shot, Doc. Million to one."

 

My favorite is from The Van Buren Boys:

GEORGE: He knows how to read. And he also knows finishing an entire book doesn't prove anything. And get this: he's into architecture.


Another classic from The Doodle:

Kramer: Well, they're in...

Jerry: What's in?

Kramer: The MACANAW PEACHES, Jerry, the MACANAW PEACHES!!!!

 

That's not even my favorite line from that episode ...

Student 1: And then I received a 740 on the English achievement test. (George looks bored)
George: Quick, what's your favorite animal?
Student 1: I ... I don't know ... frog?
George: (Disappointed) A frog?
Student 1: Well, I ... I ...
George: (Annoyed) Frog is wrong.

 

Kramer: Is it a Titleist?
George, shaking his head yes.
Kramer: Well, hole in 1.

 

Bad chicken!
Mess you up!

 

Folks, you can't make this up, taken from Olney's blog:

http://www.nypost.com/seven/07262007/sports/yankees/yanks_traveling_secretary_takes_leave_during_tax_probe_yankees_george_king.htm

 

Temporarily, Szen will be replaced by Ben Tuliebitz, a highly thought of member of the Yankees' public relations staff.