Why are you weird?

During the winter, I generally don't wear a jacket.

 

And since the topic of last meals for death row inmates came up (several pages ago...cut me some slack...I'm late to the game), I thought I'd share this.

In Huntsville (death penalty capital of America), the inmates typically get to choose what's available from the stores of food on hand. No liquor, no tobacco, etc. The favorite choice? By far, it's cheeseburgers.

 

I'd probably order a quarter-pound with cheese from McDonald's and a Nachos Bel Grande and a nacho cheese chicken chalupa from Taco Bell then call it a life.

 

What, no Sausage McGriddle and the blowjob of a lifetime?

 

You wouldn't get it, although that's not a bad last meal. They'd make the meal in the Walls Unit mess hall.

 

I knew a guy in college, who after a long and hard night of imbibing and smoking joints, ate 56 White Castle cheeseburgers.

 

That's not weird, that's impressive.

I've topped out at 22 White Castle burgers myself. 56? Jesus. How much did the guy smoke?

 

Because no matter how many times I've seen any given episode of Friends, I will watch it again and again and again. There are some nights, the re-runs are on for three straight hours. And I will watch every minute.

 

I am unique because...

- I have lived in four different states since last February
- I am a male version of a nymph
- I am a perfectionist when it comes to my work and my hobbies
- I sweat the small things too much while not concentrating on the bigger picture
- I like cottage cheese and applesauce together
- I ate 24 large pancakes in one sitting

 

So are you like one of those monkeys that just fondles its own junk all day long?

 

I guess some of my eating habits are weird. For example, I don't like chicken, and I loathe coffee, which drives me to drink lots of diet coke when I need a pick-me-up.

 

Unless it's a diagnosed sex addiction, I don't follow. Aren't all men perpetually horny?