Why are you weird?

Oh my God! He's gonna rat me out!

 

I just lose count anyway.

 

I agree with you in that you said good sex is a lot more than just the physical act.

 

You are awesome.

 

Trying to get this away from Ron Jeremy's philosophy of sex, does overthinking things make a person weird?

 

No, I think everyone overthinks things from time to time. I know I have lately about a few things.

 

I once tried that as a pick-up line. I was pretty pleased with the results. Sure, I went home alone. But I scored a career-high 67 goals in NHL '94 when I got there. Who can be upset with that? Certainly, not me.



Oh, yeah.

 

I meant her orgasms ...

dude, never get upset about having sex in your 20s ... enjoy every piece of it for good and bad and be thankful someone wants to share the moment ...

wait until you're married with kids and in your 30s before you worry about wasting those few moments you get to have sex.

 

How'd they get the two? [/my mother]

 

My favorite line in that is when Ross runs into the post at the end. Rachel says, "I'll get the hat." End scene.

 

I know OCD is the cool mental disorder to claim, but I definitely have a low-level case. For instance, there was a time in my life when I had trouble leaving the house, because I became obsessed with how much your day might change if you left five minutes later, or ten minutes earlier. Like, how you might die if you left at the wrong second and got hit by the No. 2 bus.

But it was at its worst when I worked for the newspaper. I've never told anyone this, and I'm sure my work would have been horrified to know about it at the time. Anyway, I would write my stories -- every story, long and short -- so that the sentences were all justified on the right-hand side of my screen. I don't mean I would hit the "justify" button. I would write the sentences and paragraphs so that they would fit evenly like bricks, changing words and phrasing to make them fit the pattern. Let me tell you, that was a bitch when I was writing a ball game on deadline, but even there, everything would line up. I still have days where that creeps in. I have to change the font I'm using to break out of it.

Also, when I masturbate, I think of my wife.

 

Patrick Roy was picking his ass.