Why So Bitter, Herb? 2014 Edition (page 14)

Re: Why So Bitter, Herb? (Kosher Coke Update, 2008)

Fax me some of that brisket, and I'll text you some kugel.

 

Re: Why So Bitter, Herb? (Kosher Coke Update, 2008)

Is Irish soda bread kosher?
Is anything Irish kosher?

 

Re: Why So Bitter, Herb? (Kosher Coke Update, 2008)

the girl who broke my heart in college, michelle muldoon, didn't think anything irish was kosher. i sure didn't care. father of shockey didn't care, either. she was that stunning.

mother of shockey? she was cool with michelle, too. helped set the stage for the women i dated from then on, almost all in the shiksa category.

including mrs. shockey.

"you know, mrs. shockey, jewish fathers all over the country spend thousands to get their daughter's noses like yours and your sisters," m of s said at mrs. shockey's bridal shower. "your father's a lucky man. he saved a lot of money. look at that nose, shockey. it's to die for! how does she breath through that little old thing?"

CAN'T. MAKE. THIS. STUFF. UP.

 

Re: Why So Bitter, Herb? (Kosher Coke Update, 2008)

You can make it up, shockey. I don't think you are, but others do. All the time.

We're storytellers!

 

Re: Why So Bitter, Herb? (Kosher Coke Update, 2008)

yeah, story tellers BASED IN FACTS! i, for one, never fancied myself a fiction writer. not nearly creative enough.

 

Re: Why So Bitter, Herb? (Kosher Coke Update, 2008)

...said my mother, glaring suspiciously at Boom....

 

Re: Why So Bitter, Herb? (Kosher Coke Update, 2008)

don't we all? ??? ??? ???

okay, so i'm a wee-bit jealous of the man. so sue me. sorry, boom.

 

Re: Why So Bitter, Herb? (Kosher Coke Update, 2008)

First year in the new home and the wife & I are hosting the first night's seder this year. Her mom lives 40 minutes away, so I can virtually guarantee she'll be over helping with everything. I get along with her, so it won't be that big of a deal. I think the only things I'll have to do is set the table and make sure the seder plate is good to go. Thankfully it will be a small seder - just five people (including my wife & I) as all of her local relatives are heading out of town for seders this year and I have no local relatives other than my mom who lives an hour 15 away.

 

Re: Why So Bitter, Herb? (Kosher Coke Update, 2008)

no kids at the five-person seder, estreet? who will be tortured, then? ???

 

Re: Why So Bitter, Herb? (Kosher Coke Update, 2008)

Nobody. But since my wife will be the youngest one at the seder (despite being in her 30s) I'm making her ask the four questions.

 

Re: Why So Bitter, Herb? (Kosher Coke Update, 2008)

sweet!

 

Re: Why So Bitter, Herb? (Kosher Coke Update, 2008)

She doesn't know I'm doing that to her yet.