worst/cheesiest sports movie?

Rebecca DeMornay's dad is Wally George, and if there are any SoCal SportsJournalists.commers who know Wally George, they know that his phone number is

999-5000!

 

Six Pack.

 

"Any Given Sunday" was awful...or the 15 or so minutes of it I saw on HBO were. Oliver Stone (who has made some excellent movies) was in full-on misogyny mode, so every woman in the flick is either a total bitch or a prostitute. A buddy of mine who saw it had a bunch of laughs over the "Pantheon Cup" and the horrible ass uniforms the fake teams wore.

 

That reminds me. Let's add Cameron Diaz to the list.

 

Another vote for "Ed," imminently unwatchable.

Also, another torpedo for "For the Love of the Game." We spend two hours with Kevin Costner's character and his chase for a perfect game. And NEVER ONCE is it explained what a perfect game is.

 

I haven't seen that movie since it came out (1982?) but a couple of things stand out.

There was a scene where a talking head came to Brewster Baker's (Kenny Rogers) pit to interview him before a race. I forget where he was but it wasn't where he was supposed to be, at the track. One of the kids, covering up for him, told the TV guy Brewster had gone to "shake the dew off his lily."

TV guy: "He had to what?"

Another of the kids: "He had to take a piss."

Don't know why that scene has stuck in my head all these years but I remember thinking at that time that it was funny. So sue me, I was 12.

The other thing I remember? The song. Kenny Rogers put out a lot of shitty records but "Love Will Turn You Around" is a very cool song. On top of that, Kenny himself created the guitar lick that the rest of the song was later built around, which was pretty significant in itself. Of all the hit records he's ever had, he only wrote or co-wrote four of them.

 

Just as I arrived at this thread, "Slap Shot 2" came on. Which channel? Oh, you know, where it belongs: American Movie Classics.

Um, yeah.

 

There were so many bad performances in Any Given Sunday. About the only one that didn't suck, in my mind, was Lawrence Taylor's.

 

  "Air Bud" - I only remove it from worst-ever consideration because I know what my golden retriever's bite feels like (I was trying to get an empty can of cat food away from him).
  I've never seen "A Talent for the Game," but I'm willing to bet it has something to do with why Edward James Olmos and Lorraine Bracco are no longer married.
  My choice for worst sports movie ever, and as an avid beach volleyball player it pains me to say it..."Side Out." It's the cinematic equivalent of that spike the opposing player drills into the net, only to roll over the tape and land on your side of the net. Ever wondered why C. Thomas Howell's career stalled after "The Hitcher?" Watch. Where did Peter Horton's movie career go? View. I won't even discuss how Sinjin Smith and Randy Stoklos soiled their legend as the greatest beach team ever (it came out around the time Karch Kiraly and Kent Steffes hooked up and relieved S&S of the best-ever title).
  Although based on the two straight-to-video volleyball movies she's done (including "Air Bud Spikes Back"), Gabrielle Reece won't rest until she tops (or bottoms) "Side Out."
 

 

Any Given Sunday was a suckfest, including the final game when the guy got his eye ripped out of the socket. Nevermind those fandangled facemasks, homeboy lost his eye. Really believable.

If it's cheesy you want, allow me to submit Necessary Roughness. Mizzou-alum Robert Loggia steals the show as coach Riggendorf, and as an added bonus, the team with 15 players ties Kansas. Wonder if Loggia had something to do with that.

 

double, was that the movie with Kathy Ireland as the kicker?

Speaking of which, Helen Hunt played a quarterback in a really bad early '80s football movie.