Youth Sports (i.e. the thing we all loved which parents have now ruined)

This is the best youth sports thing I’ve seen lately.

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Got it!!!

 

Three memories brought up by this thread:

— my two oldest siblings were into baseball and scouting. My sister and I (the youngest) we’re not. The main reason was because as soon as my siblings were on the field, my mother would rant non-stop to other parents on how much she hated driving kids/being there.
— later, when I was older and got into sports, I played hockey. My mother would complain directly to me on how much she hated the Saturday morning practice drive. Then she complained to anyone who would listen. I quit because I really believed I was causing my mother pain. So, basically, I have always made sure to never tell my kids that me taking them somewhere was a hassle.
— sophomore year in high school. First round it state playoffs at a neutral site in a downpour. We win. One of the seniors gathered all of us at midfield, yells “great game, now let’s go slide in the mid.” And we looked like those kids in the video.

 

Here's a fun one from this past weekend. My first grader plays rec soccer. First time we've done it in our family. But it's still like all the other sports at that age. The worst thing is the league has no actual presence on site and officiating is kind of up to those in attendance. So timing of quarters really sucks for the most part, and games are not timely, and there is no organization at the fields.

Anyway, my son's team actually isn't too bad. They don't keep score, but it's not hard to tell what the score is if you pay attention. Not a lot of bunch ball. Been pretty pleasant overall.

The team he played Saturday had two or three real good players. Scored two goals like 30 seconds into the game. One of the players is clearly the coach's kid. He never left the field. In freaking U7 rec soccer. Late in the game he gets hurt and the freaking game stopped for who knows how long until the coach could get him ready to go again. As several potential subs sat there uninvolved. Then my son's team ended up tying the game. This kid was a damn wreck afterward. I mean, again, first graders. My kids, even the competitive one, never really cared about it at that age. Like, oh crap, we tied, what is for snack? Obviously this team has wiped the floor with everyone, but he gets it from somewhere -- you know, the not being taken out of the game ever, the game being stopped for him, and all that. He's going to be a peach in a few years, even if he is the best player. And the coach, a mom, not that matters, let it all happen.

Our coach is a volunteer who did it because no one stepped up and I respect the crap out of people who do that. I don't have the will to do it, so I keep most things to myself. He's doing a pretty good job, the age is tough. But I've done enough assisting and things that if I was involved and another team pulled the crap that coach did with stopping the game until her kid felt ok to play again, I would have been all over it. Our coach didn't like it but he just didn't know how to react. Also, it drives me nuts there are no league officials at this level of games. There needs to be at least a field manager or something. This is the crap that happens without it.

Mostly kind of fun ranting here, but thought all of this was a good example of youth sports being ruined.

 

We lost this weekend 7-6, and about one-third of our parents apparently can't handle losing. They were just berating the refs after the game.

(As it turns out after reviewing the video - we were ref-screwed ... two TDs and a long run called back on phantom holds, plus on our failed extra point the other team had 12 players on defense. Yet still: I believe strongly in not screaming at refs)

Some things you should know about me:
- I'm the coach least likely to yell at a kid for a failure in execution. I'll yell for a lack of hustle, or lack of attention to non-athletic things, but I don't yell because that other 11 year old just got the better of you on that play.
- I'm the coach who wants to play every kid. I think every kid should be a starter at one spot or another, and if you're a "minimum play" kid, we shouldn't have taken you onto our team.
- My kid is our Center. Because we run Single Wing, we directional snap and it's pretty tricky. My kid (No. 15) does a great job with it. He doesn't play a lick of defense for us, but he's basically a secret MVP to running the offense we do. Also: Our offensive line - even when we lost Saturday - has been dominant.


Here's the text the head coach got yesterday:

"Hey so I wanted to address this situation before I got to practice n went off n it get ugly I don't know who Justin thinks he is but he better not ever in his life yell at my child again n tell him don't ask him to sub him in bc he is not getting in first of all we paid just like everyone else my son is apart of the team n be able to play no matter how small he is or how good he is that's wrong don't make him feel like he ain't shit n can't help his team Dre got a lot of heart to be as little as he is n if he wants to go there his son the center number 15 can barley hold a damn block but he plays the entire game never coming out why bc he is the coaches son of course but ima make this very clear I will go smooth tf off behind my kids idc who u are man or woman I fight both n I will disrepect the shit outta him if he ever does it again thats why I'm coming to u bc ur the head coach second he gonna tell Bennie stop holding ur the reason our touchdown was called back like who tf does that if u want to be real its y'alls fault we lost period should have never called taht dumbass play on the 5/6 yard line that was bs even though we were playing against the refs n the other team we were still whooping they ass they would of never scored period idc how anyone feels ima speak my mind n he better know not to disprespect my kid again or ima go right to his ugly ass n tell him about hisself n I mean that shit wholeheartedly."

 

Print that text, use your red pen to edit it and hand it back to the parent. That'll go over real well.

 

21st century America explained.

 

We got pushed into a game this upcoming Saturday against some god damn super elite "nationally regarded" team, and we're probably going to lose. This shit is going to come to a head.

I absolutely love coaching football, and up until this point the parents and the kids all seem to like me. In several years of rec, literally all of my kids signed up to play again the following year - which should be the measuring stick for a youth coach. Parents this year have just sucked the joy right out of it, I think because they think somehow this is all really, really important.

 

It is important to them, and that's the problem. No one else cares, but they don't see it that way. They see it as the most important thing there is to them in that moment. They also only care about their kid, which is also a problem. They are too blinded to see the whole picture, just what their kid does, or look outside of that enough to see what someone else's kid does wrong.

What it does is it makes them a butt to their children too, who then take on that attitude. So instead of being about improvement and growth and even the team, the kid starts becoming to individualized too and from there, the coachability is gone and so might be the ability to get better. Worse, it may even make the kid not enjoy playing because they don't want to deal with their parents. Then the kid isn't playing at all, so good job Dad, or they hate it so much it makes their parents even more upset with the effort.

Funny enough we had a baseball program wide BBQ yesterday and the head of actual baseball says that of course they want to win but they want to develop more. But he said if you develop right winning comes with that. He also said doing too much means the kids lose interest and then they aren't playing at all, so that's no good either. Even worse they could get hurt. He'd rather have two hours of solid practice once a week than five days of nonsense. I really like that approach. People don't get that all of this is a piece to the puzzle to get Johnny to be where you sort of want him to be (not that he'll ever live up to expectations).

We've also talked here about supporting the team in regard to all that. That obviously isn't happening with your group at the moment. I don't even know how you address it. You are a better man than me taking it all on!

 

This is well said.

I tell every parent who broaches the subject, "Look - you signed up to play games, but actually I'm way more interested in practices and working to improve as individuals."

The games to me need to be treated like ballet recitals. You hit some movements. You miss on some others. So let's celebrate the ones we got right, and work to improve the ones we got wrong. Usually if you do more things right than you did wrong, you win. Sometimes that's not the case, though. But if you're measuring youth football by wins and losses, you're doing it wrong.

On Saturday we rushed for 179 yards on 24 carries, and we held the other team to 70 yards of total offense (and that's with about 100 yards in rushing called back on specious penalties). We'll be on zoom tonight watching game film with kids pointing out all the wonderful plays we executed and talking about what we can do better.

Some of the moms and dads will dwell on the two plays that we got wrong (one on offense; one of defense), and that'll be their "proof" that the coaches suck.

Her bagging on my kid hurts a little bit. My kid is a super nice. Always got a smile on his face. A good teammate. And a good center who can snap it under center, or directional snap to three different kids in our offense (either of the two running backs, or the sniffer). He doesn't cry about playing on the OLine, even though he does want to catch a pass or two. We have zero offensive line depth, and early in the preseason we had crazy mom's kid working at Tight End, where he could help us, and the dad interrupted practice to explain how his son isn't a tight end and is just wasting his time practicing there (so OK - go be our 10th best option at running back).

The thought of her up in the stands bitching to people that No. 15 (my son) is in the game on offense while her son is on the bench grates me to no end.

Still. I try to soothe my hurt feelings thinking about plays like this that we teach - an actual football play with actual execution. (This got called back for holding on our backside guard ... nevermind it had no impact on the play ... and nevermind that their defensive line was cutting our linemen trying to take away wedge ... apparently we held the dtackle while he was launching himself at our ankles).

 

Hey Justin is that strictly single wing stuff you guys use at the Youth League level? Or do you use any Notre Dame box plays? I saw a team Friday night that did a lot of Buck Lateral stuff. Also did some misdirection stuff out of what appeared to be the Notre Dame Box, sometimes with the QB under center. I couldn't locate the ball on more than one occasion

 

We mostly use the Syracuse-based stuff. Notre Dame - and all the buck lateral stuff - is super cool. But maintaining the pitch relationship for the option pitch out of buck lateral scares me out of 11 year olds.

Single Wing is super versatile, and lots of different flavors for sure. What team did you see running it on Friday?