Is it unethical to....

[pallister]

You didn't capitalize God, Mert. I knew you were a soulless heathen. (that's how you do it, moron)

 

[MertWindu]

You didn't capitalize God, Mert. I knew you were a soulless heathen. (that's how you do it, moron)

You know, I even thought about that after I posted it. And then I thought, nahhhhh, none of the Right Wing Loonies would venture over here....

 

[chazp]

Yes, dating is unethical. I know of a writer, who a few years back started dating a junior college volleyball coach and created plenty of problems for everyone. He's no longer at the paper that covers that JC, and the college was replaced at the college. It's more than unethical, it's asking for big time trouble.

 

[zeke12]

Is it unethical if you finish on her grille?

 

[Bob Loblaw Law Blog]

Only if it's "grille" with an "e." Then it's classy.

 

[Double Down]

If you're a professional, then no. It's not ethical. Or advisable. Also, don't ever date someone in high school if you are also not in high school. Even if you're 19 and working as a preps reporter for the local rag, and she's 17 and a smokin' hot soccer player, and you were in high school together a year ago, don't do it. Wait a year. She'll graduate, and if she's still interested, then maybe you can see if it's worth pursuing.

HOWEVER! [/stephenA.smith] In the interest of full disclosure, I will share this story. If you are both in college, I think it's a bit of a gray area as long as you aren't directly covering this person, but I say this knowing I'm biased. As a college junior, I was my student paper's sports editor. I knew, and got along great with, a number of college athletes. I never, ever "covered" the college volleyball team, but I did do a weekly smartass question and answer thing where I picked a different athlete and threw all kinds of wacky questions at them. Being the Title IX-loving pinko that I am, I rotated it guy-gal each week. I ended up picking, one week, the star of the volleyball team. She was nervous about it (because she was dumb, and athletes usually tried to act witty and funny), so she asked if her two best friends could sit in on the interview for moral support. I said cool. I knew both of them a bit socially, but not very well. After the interview, I struck up a conversation with star volleyball player's best friend, a smokin' hot, 5-foot-11 blonde. I made her laugh a bit as walked out of the gym, and about a month later, we saw one another at the bar, struck up a conversation, shared a few laughs, and ended up, at closing time, going home together. But instead of being a one-night stand, it turned into a three year relationship. (At one point, we both thought we were headed toward marriage.) It did, however, create some problems for me and her. She was a very good player, and ended up being one of the school's all-time leaders in kills and digs, and though I didn't cover the team and was no longer the sports editor by the time we started dating, every time her name or picture showed up in the paper, people on both ends wondered whether it was based on merit or because she was my girlfriend, even though I purposely stayed completely ignorant of all sports decisions. Things got even more awkward when I worked for the local city paper my senior year, because even though I didn't cover her, one of my coworkers did. It wasn't as if it was a competitive beat, but it was a beat none the less. And when the volleyball coach got fired at mid-season, the sports editor was kind enough not to ask me about it (when I was hired, I told him I wouldn't cover any of her matches and hoped he would respect that), but I still felt like I was letting him down as a journalist. I also thought he probably wondered what I knew and when I knew it (which in reality was very little, and about five minutes before he knew it).

Now ... do I regret dating her? Nope. Though we eventually split (when she wouldn't move with me to the big city as I pursued my sports writing dreams), it's still one of the most formative and important relationships of my life.

Did I fork up as a journalist? I don't know. I didn't really care then, and don't particularly care now. When you get older, you find out that newspapers are full of all kinds of complex relationships, some of them that can tie you into ethical pretzels if you let them. I don't think you can tell two people not to fall in love, but the best advice breaks down like this:

1. Don't get involved with the people you cover, especially those you directly cover.
2. If it does happen, talk about it with your boss before he/she hears about it second-hand.
3. If you value the relationship, and you value your job, ask to be removed from any potential conflict. And remember, even the "appearance of a potential conflict" is still a conflict.


We may now return to your regularly scheduled quips.

(And a big hello to all my college friends who now know my SportsJournalists.com handle.)

 

[slipshod]

If a volleyball player would date me at my age, ethics be damned!

 

[Simon_Cowbell]

Stay away, JohnnyCakes.

Stay away.

 

[sartrean]

What about dating the coach of a girls basketball team?

 

[Fenian_Bastard]

Scoundrel?

 

[2muchcoffeeman]

Is it unethical to date someone on a team you are covering?

Yes.

 

[2muchcoffeeman]

Stop lying, Pern! You know you made me quote all of Leia's lines last night

The way I heard it, the only one of Leia's lines you quoted was "I'd rather kiss a Wookie!"