Colonoscopy ... give me good vibes

[ChrisLong]

I told FIVE medical people they were absolutely wrong about something, but they are so arrogant they didn't believe me.
I snore when I sleep on my back -- I know this -- so I don't. I sleep on my side and roll from side to side throughout the night. I usually sleep just fine.

I had a procedure that put me out. When I woke up, the nurse assigned to me told me that I had sleep apnea. No, I told her. She took a brief break and a different nurse looked in on me. She told me I had sleep apnea. No, I said, I do not have sleep apnea. The anaesthesiologist stopped in when my doctor was there and said I had sleep apnea. Doctor nodded. I told them that I know I snore when I sleep on my back so I don't. But in a narrow hospital bed with wires and tubes attached to my body, it is impossible to roll over on your side, so you stay on your back. That's why I was snoring. When I was being discharged, the head nurse had to check me out for release. She said I had sleep apnea. She had an attitude that rhymed with witch so I just shook my head no.

As a result, my doctor ordered me to have a sleep apnea test. I had to go to a clinic and stay the night with monitors all over me. I did carefully roll over a few times. I felt it was a bullshit test. I usually sleep from after midnight to maybe 9 a.m. For this test, it was lights out at 10:30 p.m., wake up at 6:30 a.m. -- not my usual sleep cycle. Result: I snored 4 percent of the time. I do not have sleep apnea.

 

[outofplace]

If you don't mind me asking, what were the procedures for which you declined anesthesia? Was it painful/uncomfortable?

In both cases, I was following the doctor's recommendation. The first I have mentioned before. I was given Twilight sedation and a nerve block so that I could not feel anything from my knee down for two days when I had my first foot surgery. If you haven't had Twilight, you aren't fully knocked out, but you are quite loopy and usually fall asleep. The problem with that is you might wake up during a procedure as I did. I couldn't feel anything, but it made me a difficult patient. The primary issue was that I move a lot in my sleep. I didn't mention that because they didn't ask. While my foot was cut open, I kicked out and brushed the open wound against a surgical curtain. They had to pump me with extra antibiotics, but otherwise, I didn't suffer any long-term effects from it. I did, however, wake up with about a half hour remaining in the procedure. I kept asking if I could look at what they were doing. The anesthesiologist was very annoyed. Can you imagine me being difficult?

The other procedure was a sigmoidoscopy. They go the same route as the colonoscopy, but only go to the colon. I think they also use a narrower tube. The prep is the same. I showed up thinking they were knocking me out, but they said they normally don't. This avoids the risks of full anesthetic and the limitations on the rest of my day that come with being knocked all the way out. It was more uncomfortable than painful. It isn't something I would want to repeat often, but I've been through worse.

 

[BYH 2: Electric Boogaloo]

Ahh yes I remember the foot story now. I do not remember the colonoscopy squared story and am sorry you had to not only go thru that. The only good part about the colonoscopy prep is the good nap at the very end and they took that away from you!

 

[outofplace]

Ahh yes I remember the foot story now. I do not remember the colonoscopy squared story and am sorry you had to not only go thru that. The only good part about the colonoscopy prep is the good nap at the very end and they took that away from you!

I only told the foot story before, not the sigmoidoscopy.

I forgot to mention how odd it was watching the view from the camera on a big screen in the room. lol

 

[Deskgrunt50]

I only told the foot story before, not the sigmoidoscopy.

I forgot to mention how odd it was watching the view from the camera on a big screen in the room. lol

I was not expecting, nor wanting, pictures from my colonoscopy in the post-procedure report. Yet there they were.

As a great friend said, "Use them for your Christmas card."

 

[micropolitan guy]

I was not expecting, nor wanting, pictures from my colonoscopy in the post-procedure report. Yet there they were.

As a great friend said, "Use them for your Christmas card."

Show them to your friends and say, "See, this proves I'm a perfect asshole."

 

[ChrisLong]

I was not expecting, nor wanting, pictures from my colonoscopy in the post-procedure report. Yet there they were.

As a great friend said, "Use them for your Christmas card."

I was surprised to get that, too. One of the photos looked like a bagel. I was glad it didn't look like it was smeared with strawberry jam.